God granted Chuck Norris the ability to create laws of physics, so Chuck Norris created himself.
Chuck Norris doesn't have real enemies; they're too afraid to be born.
When a bullet exits a gun in Chuck Norris' presence it's because it thinks it can get away from him.
When Chuck Norris builds a nuclear weapon, energy equals mass times the speed of Chuck Norris squared.
Chuck Norris can know the speed and position of a particle simultaneously. But scientists cannot know Chuck Norris' speed or position.
Chuck Norris writes Chuck Norris facts sometimes but to him they all seem to be direct logical consequences of the Peano Axioms, so it's an unnecessary exercise.
When Chuck Norris writes Chuck Norris facts, the jokes are never too obscure.