Author Topic: Chuck Norris Facts  (Read 27791 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Onion

  • Hero Member
  • Kupo!
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1003
Chuck Norris Facts
« on: August 25, 2011, 01:03:30 am »
Here how you play.

Post a Chuck Norris Fact. It can be tottaly original or a good one you seen somewhere, you'd like to share.
« Last Edit: August 25, 2011, 01:07:55 am by Onion »

Offline Onion

  • Hero Member
  • Kupo!
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1003
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #1 on: August 25, 2011, 01:06:29 am »
Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.

Offline Mylo

  • *
  • Posts: 4298
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #2 on: August 25, 2011, 01:08:54 am »
Chuck Norris can shoot bullets without a gun.

Offline Mylo

  • *
  • Posts: 4298
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #3 on: August 25, 2011, 01:14:46 am »
Chuck Norris can stare at the sun.

Offline Mylo

  • *
  • Posts: 4298
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #4 on: August 25, 2011, 01:17:03 am »
Chuck Norris doesn't have to go to Burger King or Subway to have it his way.

Offline Loc

  • Tea-obsessed transhumanist and Buddhist.
  • Species: Cyborg snow leopard
  • The ending of the words is ALMSIVI.
  • *
  • Posts: 4758
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #5 on: August 25, 2011, 03:12:18 am »
Chuck Norris doesn't pay attention - Attention pays him.

Avatar by Shibara, sig by Miser

0.1.0 Alaskan Malamute, Kimba
0.0.1 amel stripe corn snake, Vivec
RIP Dany, Gelbstoff

FFSc3ar A+ C D- H- M P+ R++ T++ W Z- Sf# RLS* a cn+ d+ e++ f h+++ i++ j+ p+++ sf#

Offline Ragnorrock_13

  • Hero Member
  • Spread the love
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 699
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #6 on: August 25, 2011, 09:35:15 am »
Chuck Norris once went to the Virgin Islands. When he left, they were just called the Islands.
Next time, I'll collect the money, and you can die!
The perfect blossom is a rare thing. You could spend your life looking for one, and it would not be a wasted life.

Offline 489109

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 2185
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #7 on: August 25, 2011, 01:43:41 pm »
.
« Last Edit: March 04, 2012, 01:19:57 pm by Alexandre »

Offline Loc

  • Tea-obsessed transhumanist and Buddhist.
  • Species: Cyborg snow leopard
  • The ending of the words is ALMSIVI.
  • *
  • Posts: 4758
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #8 on: August 25, 2011, 01:48:30 pm »
Superman got his powers when Chuck Norris sneezed on him.

Avatar by Shibara, sig by Miser

0.1.0 Alaskan Malamute, Kimba
0.0.1 amel stripe corn snake, Vivec
RIP Dany, Gelbstoff

FFSc3ar A+ C D- H- M P+ R++ T++ W Z- Sf# RLS* a cn+ d+ e++ f h+++ i++ j+ p+++ sf#

Offline Jacoby Quinn

  • Hero Member
  • My snark is worse than my bite
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 8955
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #9 on: August 25, 2011, 06:01:51 pm »
cuuck norris uses a razorwire back scratcher (replaced after every use)
how many neon pink and black rabbits does it take to screw up a lightbulb factory?

Offline Onion

  • Hero Member
  • Kupo!
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1003
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #10 on: August 25, 2011, 08:58:56 pm »
Jesus follows Chuck Norris on Twitter.  (:

Offline Mylo

  • *
  • Posts: 4298
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #11 on: August 26, 2011, 12:13:13 am »
Chuck Norris doesn't need a Lytro camera...he's always in focus.

Offline Ragnorrock_13

  • Hero Member
  • Spread the love
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 699
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #12 on: August 26, 2011, 12:20:03 am »
Chuck Norris once had a staring contest with Medusa. You can probably guess who won.
Next time, I'll collect the money, and you can die!
The perfect blossom is a rare thing. You could spend your life looking for one, and it would not be a wasted life.

Offline Mylo

  • *
  • Posts: 4298
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #13 on: August 26, 2011, 12:48:49 am »
Hydrogen forms helium when Chuck Norris punches the air.

Offline Ragnorrock_13

  • Hero Member
  • Spread the love
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 699
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #14 on: August 26, 2011, 01:10:22 am »
Chuck Norris once lost a fight, only to understand the feeling.
Next time, I'll collect the money, and you can die!
The perfect blossom is a rare thing. You could spend your life looking for one, and it would not be a wasted life.

Offline Narei Mooncatt

  • Hero Member
  • Knight of the Road
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 4119
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #15 on: August 26, 2011, 03:36:18 am »
That Earthquake in Virginia was just Chuck Norris doing jumping jacks.

Couple of classics I like:

Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He pushes the earth down.
Under Chuck Norris' beard is another fist.
I've got a 53' tail. Truck driver by trade, professional tourist by choice.

Offline Kobuk

  • The "Malamute Dewd"
  • Hero Member
  • Species: Anthro Alaskan Malamute (Husky)
  • #1 Dew drinker.
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 28545
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #16 on: August 26, 2011, 06:25:57 am »
Chuck Norris can "Do the Dew". ;)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIgey9NLdhk

Offline Alsek

  • The Fluffy Destroyer of Tasty Fish
  • Species: White Wolf Pup
  • *****
  • Posts: 5234
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #17 on: August 26, 2011, 10:30:52 am »
Chuck Norris is an Ungulate!

You're doing it wrong.



Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.

Offline Eddy

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 771
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #18 on: August 26, 2011, 11:25:27 am »
Chuck Norris has an extra fist underneath his beard.

Offline Kobuk

  • The "Malamute Dewd"
  • Hero Member
  • Species: Anthro Alaskan Malamute (Husky)
  • #1 Dew drinker.
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 28545
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #19 on: August 26, 2011, 04:34:21 pm »
Chuck Norris is actually a carnivore furry wearing a human disguise. ;)

Offline Narei Mooncatt

  • Hero Member
  • Knight of the Road
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 4119
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #20 on: August 26, 2011, 04:36:52 pm »
When Chuck Norris reads a Chuck Norris Fact, he doesn't laugh. he simply nods.
I've got a 53' tail. Truck driver by trade, professional tourist by choice.

Offline Onion

  • Hero Member
  • Kupo!
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1003
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #21 on: August 26, 2011, 10:23:03 pm »
Chuck Norris can out dance Mr.Six

Offline Onion

  • Hero Member
  • Kupo!
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1003
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #22 on: August 26, 2011, 10:50:55 pm »
Yes, Chuck Norris can in fact "Kill you with kindness"!

Offline Ragnorrock_13

  • Hero Member
  • Spread the love
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 699
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #23 on: August 26, 2011, 11:56:51 pm »
Neil Armstrong is not the first man on the moon. Chuck Norris round house kicked a man onto the moon three weeks before the Apollo mission was even imagined.
Next time, I'll collect the money, and you can die!
The perfect blossom is a rare thing. You could spend your life looking for one, and it would not be a wasted life.

Offline Avor

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 511
Re: Chuck Norris Facts
« Reply #24 on: August 27, 2011, 04:16:51 am »
Chuck Norris got his but kicked by BRice Lee.