I've also come to the conclusion that this isn't a survival RP. It's a torturous, drawn-out slaughterhouse... and i think i like it better that way. Needs more dead people... If i were to join you could obviously just kill my character off saying it was an 'accident' so i don't see this being a long term investment, so to speak.
That being said, would it be okay if i asked to join? I understand in full why you would not want a fellow psychopath on the dance floor, so don't worry about disappointing me when you kick me off of the Cliffs of Hope into the Ocean of Revenge.