this is very nicely done. I myself tend to steer away from the poetry end of writing. This here sounds like it is great, but to be honest I dont get poetry. according to others, I can write it really well. But for me, poetry makes no sense. Like at the end of this one. But its all worth it in the end
That is a great ending to a poem. But when i read a poem, even this one, I can't make sense of it. They always feel wrong to me, like its not even writing, just a mess of ideas on a page. I know this is well written and kudos to anyone who can find a way to improve it, because I think its perfect, but its just me. Even my own poetry makes no sense to me. Dont get me wrong please, this is great stuff, I just never understand poetry. even great poets like Edger Allen Poe. none of his stuff makes any sense to me either.
its just me, but great job on this one.