Author Topic: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes  (Read 1501 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Wildhead_the_fox

  • Full Member
  • Species: Red Fox
  • Your friendly neighborhood Red Fox! :)
  • ***
  • Male
  • Posts: 155
In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« on: February 09, 2015, 02:27:50 pm »
So, the rules are simple! Post an "in Soviet Russia" joke(s) in the thread below!


*in Russian accent* Have fun!
Normal people look at things that are and ask, "Why?"
True innovators look at things that aren't and ask, "Why not?"

Offline Amducious

  • Hero Member
  • Species: The insane feral Sergal
  • Still breathing
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1609
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #1 on: February 09, 2015, 03:39:15 pm »
In Soviet Russia we include a mini ballistic knife in every Russian happy meal
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fWgOC4xCVPI Hands down one of my favorite songs by Buckethead

Art by WhiteAkitaKeiko check out her art I'm sure you'll be amazed! --> http://forums.furtopia.org/artwork-announcements/akita%27s-art-journey!/125/

Offline Wildhead_the_fox

  • Full Member
  • Species: Red Fox
  • Your friendly neighborhood Red Fox! :)
  • ***
  • Male
  • Posts: 155
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2015, 04:15:37 pm »
In soviet Russia, you don't swim in water, water swim in you!
Normal people look at things that are and ask, "Why?"
True innovators look at things that aren't and ask, "Why not?"

Offline Turgius

  • Sr. Member
  • Species: Anthro Wolf/Dragon thing of questionable sanity...
  • Avatar is Artz by Flinters on FA
  • ****
  • Posts: 281
    • FA Account
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #3 on: February 09, 2015, 06:02:12 pm »
In Soviet Russia, you don't drive tanks, tanks drive over you!
« Last Edit: February 09, 2015, 06:04:30 pm by Turgius »
“Oh I've plenty of time, my time is entirely my own.”
― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Идиот

FCWh3a A C D H M P R T+++ W- Z Sm- RLGP a cn++ d++ e++ f-- h- i++ j p sm-
-Furry Code

Offline Kobuk

  • The "Malamute Dewd"
  • Hero Member
  • Species: Anthro Alaskan Malamute (Husky)
  • #1 Dew drinker.
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 26988
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #4 on: February 09, 2015, 06:20:20 pm »
In Soviet Russia, you don't listen to radio, radio listens to you!

(And it's quite true actually. The KGB had listening devices everywhere. They could spy and eavesdrop on anybody and you wouldn't even know it.  8) )
Click link below for more fursuit information. ;)
http://forums.furtopia.org/kobuk's-fursuit-guides/

Offline Firelight

  • Hero Member
  • Species: Folf, alt cross fox, Dad
  • Join us!
  • *****
  • Female
  • Posts: 734
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #5 on: February 09, 2015, 06:56:49 pm »
In Soviet Russia dog own you XD

Offline Amducious

  • Hero Member
  • Species: The insane feral Sergal
  • Still breathing
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1609
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #6 on: February 09, 2015, 07:02:13 pm »
In Soviet Russia we include mini AK-47 in every Russian happy meal. Putin action figure sold separately.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fWgOC4xCVPI Hands down one of my favorite songs by Buckethead

Art by WhiteAkitaKeiko check out her art I'm sure you'll be amazed! --> http://forums.furtopia.org/artwork-announcements/akita%27s-art-journey!/125/

Offline Wildhead_the_fox

  • Full Member
  • Species: Red Fox
  • Your friendly neighborhood Red Fox! :)
  • ***
  • Male
  • Posts: 155
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #7 on: February 10, 2015, 02:41:27 pm »
In soviet Russia, Chuck Norris still finds you!
Normal people look at things that are and ask, "Why?"
True innovators look at things that aren't and ask, "Why not?"

Offline Turgius

  • Sr. Member
  • Species: Anthro Wolf/Dragon thing of questionable sanity...
  • Avatar is Artz by Flinters on FA
  • ****
  • Posts: 281
    • FA Account
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #8 on: February 10, 2015, 06:35:47 pm »
In Soviet Russia, blocks arrange You!
“Oh I've plenty of time, my time is entirely my own.”
― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Идиот

FCWh3a A C D H M P R T+++ W- Z Sm- RLGP a cn++ d++ e++ f-- h- i++ j p sm-
-Furry Code

Offline Rocket T. Coyote

  • Hero Member
  • Species: Canis Latrans Rocketus
  • The Furry Model Rocketeer
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1858
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #9 on: February 13, 2015, 09:26:23 pm »
In Soviet Russia, you don't find party--Party finds you!
"The coyote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck, and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him. And even the fleas would dessert him for a velocipide."~Mark Twain
(Baps the old humorist.)

Offline Turgius

  • Sr. Member
  • Species: Anthro Wolf/Dragon thing of questionable sanity...
  • Avatar is Artz by Flinters on FA
  • ****
  • Posts: 281
    • FA Account
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #10 on: February 14, 2015, 06:08:44 am »
In Soviet Russia you don't make choice, choice made for you!
“Oh I've plenty of time, my time is entirely my own.”
― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Идиот

FCWh3a A C D H M P R T+++ W- Z Sm- RLGP a cn++ d++ e++ f-- h- i++ j p sm-
-Furry Code

Offline Wildhead_the_fox

  • Full Member
  • Species: Red Fox
  • Your friendly neighborhood Red Fox! :)
  • ***
  • Male
  • Posts: 155
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #11 on: February 14, 2015, 10:45:28 am »
In Soviet Russia you don't make choice, choice made for you!

(Actually, that's quite true, because of the communist government!)

In soviet Russia, you don't eat ice cream, ice cream eat you.
Normal people look at things that are and ask, "Why?"
True innovators look at things that aren't and ask, "Why not?"

Offline Amducious

  • Hero Member
  • Species: The insane feral Sergal
  • Still breathing
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1609
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #12 on: February 14, 2015, 11:00:11 am »
in soviet russia i don't always drink beer but when i do it's Ukraine's
« Last Edit: February 14, 2015, 11:06:47 am by Amducious »
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fWgOC4xCVPI Hands down one of my favorite songs by Buckethead

Art by WhiteAkitaKeiko check out her art I'm sure you'll be amazed! --> http://forums.furtopia.org/artwork-announcements/akita%27s-art-journey!/125/

Offline HazardJackal

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5168
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #13 on: February 15, 2015, 01:41:34 pm »
In Soviet Russia... it's cold...

Offline Turgius

  • Sr. Member
  • Species: Anthro Wolf/Dragon thing of questionable sanity...
  • Avatar is Artz by Flinters on FA
  • ****
  • Posts: 281
    • FA Account
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #14 on: February 16, 2015, 08:34:22 am »
In Soviet Russia, Putin not on Ritz, Ritz is on Putin!  (:
“Oh I've plenty of time, my time is entirely my own.”
― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Идиот

FCWh3a A C D H M P R T+++ W- Z Sm- RLGP a cn++ d++ e++ f-- h- i++ j p sm-
-Furry Code

Offline HazardJackal

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5168
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #15 on: March 02, 2015, 05:41:47 pm »
In Soviet Russia, there are no horses; only bears.

Offline Tommy Fox Stone

  • Hero Member
  • Commander Of Skull Squadron...RDF...
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 5135
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #16 on: April 02, 2015, 01:08:34 pm »
In Soviet Russia, Vodka drinks you!...
Captain T F Stone
 U.S.S. DEFIANT NX-74205
One Photon Torpedo Can Ruin Your Whole Day THINK ABOUT IT


Another winters day Another grey reminder of what used too be that has gone away Its really hard too say how long we have too live with our insanity we have too pay for all we use and we never think before we light the fuse...

Member of the Millennium Club...

C.S.A.

GOD BLESS TRUMP!...

Offline Aloneness

  • Hero Member
  • Species: Hella Gay Wolf
  • Великий ведра огонь!
  • *****
  • Female
  • Posts: 861
    • DeviantArt
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #17 on: April 02, 2015, 03:16:30 pm »
In soviet Russia capitalist America jokes make you...
« Last Edit: April 02, 2015, 03:18:31 pm by Aloneness »
Ren's Translation Note:
Konnichiwa = Hello, Nani = What?, Великий ведра огонь! = Great Buckets of Fire!

Avi by Haru

Offline Rocket T. Coyote

  • Hero Member
  • Species: Canis Latrans Rocketus
  • The Furry Model Rocketeer
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1858
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #18 on: April 04, 2015, 07:51:05 am »
In Soviet Russia, holiday is for attending military parade on holiday.
"The coyote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck, and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him. And even the fleas would dessert him for a velocipide."~Mark Twain
(Baps the old humorist.)

Offline Old Rabbit

  • Species: Rabbit Artist
  • Offical Birthday Wisher.
  • *
  • Male
  • Posts: 14530
    • Art by Oldrabbit
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #19 on: April 05, 2015, 09:25:22 am »
In Soviet Russia they waited in lines two blocks long for Toilet paper. 
oldrabbit.com
My .com site is currently down. Hope to have it up
again soon.
Avatar drawn by me.

Offline Tommy Fox Stone

  • Hero Member
  • Commander Of Skull Squadron...RDF...
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 5135
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #20 on: April 08, 2015, 07:35:58 am »
In Soviet Russia McDonalds eat's you!...
Captain T F Stone
 U.S.S. DEFIANT NX-74205
One Photon Torpedo Can Ruin Your Whole Day THINK ABOUT IT


Another winters day Another grey reminder of what used too be that has gone away Its really hard too say how long we have too live with our insanity we have too pay for all we use and we never think before we light the fuse...

Member of the Millennium Club...

C.S.A.

GOD BLESS TRUMP!...

Offline Rocket T. Coyote

  • Hero Member
  • Species: Canis Latrans Rocketus
  • The Furry Model Rocketeer
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1858
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #21 on: May 09, 2015, 07:35:15 pm »
In Soviet Russia, shredded wheat breakfast also perfect for scrubbing pots & pans.
"The coyote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck, and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him. And even the fleas would dessert him for a velocipide."~Mark Twain
(Baps the old humorist.)

Offline Rocket T. Coyote

  • Hero Member
  • Species: Canis Latrans Rocketus
  • The Furry Model Rocketeer
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1858
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #22 on: December 07, 2015, 08:13:11 pm »
In Soviet Russia, television watches you.
"The coyote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck, and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him. And even the fleas would dessert him for a velocipide."~Mark Twain
(Baps the old humorist.)

Offline viper213

  • Full Member
  • Species: fox
  • ***
  • Male
  • Posts: 163
    • my soundcloud
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #23 on: December 09, 2015, 08:37:17 am »
In russia terms of service violate you

(Sorry not that good apologise in advan e in future posts)
FCF3adf A- C- D H+ M- P R- T++ W- a- cn+++ d+ e+ f h* iwf++ j p

https://m.soundcloud.com/heyguesswhathi
My music channel if your intrested

Offline Old Rabbit

  • Species: Rabbit Artist
  • Offical Birthday Wisher.
  • *
  • Male
  • Posts: 14530
    • Art by Oldrabbit
Re: In Soviet Russia, "___" jokes
« Reply #24 on: December 09, 2015, 09:39:59 am »
In Soviet Russia we make all shoes for left foot.

(There was a factory in Russia that did turn out all left shoes
due to some error or by design. Who knows.)




« Last Edit: December 09, 2015, 09:41:33 am by Old Rabbit »
oldrabbit.com
My .com site is currently down. Hope to have it up
again soon.
Avatar drawn by me.