Author Topic: Wise's short story challenge!!!  (Read 2307 times)

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Offline The Wise one

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Wise's short story challenge!!!
« on: July 27, 2012, 04:46:56 pm »
Hey. I figured I might as well start with this *Cracks knuckles* Alright. Lets do it!!! Give me a word and lets start this thing off!
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Offline Psycho

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #1 on: July 27, 2012, 04:48:25 pm »
Lovers

Offline The Wise one

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #2 on: July 27, 2012, 04:58:55 pm »
(Lovers.)

Once, there was a couple. One who had found herself deeply in love. But love cannot be real as it is only an illusion distracting us from the world. The other saw love just as that. But he did hope to settle down one day and start a family, so that he may be the better example for the next generation to come. You could say he "loved" her in the sense. But it was not love. It was looking to the future of the endless possibilities. The girl asked "Do you love me" and he said no. She started to walk off crying. He stopped her with a gentle grip on her shoulder and gave her a soft smile. He explained to her why twas not love that drove him. It was her personality that made her different and therefore the only bearable person in the world. That she was the only one that mattered to him. That in this world of corruption and darkness, there was a light. She...was that light.

He then taught her the values of life and for what could seem like no apparent reason, he left her. But she didnt cry. No...she had taken the advice and lessons she had taught him and started teaching others. Five years later, she had wanted to see that boy of what would now be a man. She looked deeply but it turns that there was nobody by the name. He had never existed.

(Sorry. I felt like I didnt do too well on that one. But its a challenge. And boy do I love a challenge :D)
« Last Edit: July 27, 2012, 05:26:55 pm by The Wise one »
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Offline Blackrose13

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #3 on: July 27, 2012, 05:00:29 pm »
Lament.
"Snuzzles!"
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Offline Psycho

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #4 on: July 27, 2012, 05:06:16 pm »
I liked it except for the second paragraph. :V
...Actually if you don't mind, can I rewrite the ending to that story? xD
« Last Edit: July 27, 2012, 05:07:56 pm by Psycho »

Offline The Wise one

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #5 on: July 27, 2012, 05:14:21 pm »
(Eh. Go ahead. Knock yourself out.)
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Offline The Wise one

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #6 on: July 27, 2012, 05:26:16 pm »
(Lament.)

The grandfather I once knew...dead. I was at his funeral thinking about how I barely him so. He has done so much for me, but I have done so little for him. He fought for our freedom, gave me hats as a small child, and taught me about things I never would've known about. I was deeper in thought than what would have seemed possible. When my grandfather was given the 21-gun salute, I didnt even hear the weapons go off when they were only fifteen feet away. I cried harder than any other person there, even harder than the people who knew him better than I did.
I cried not necessarily because he missed him, but because I wished to have known him better.

It is truly one of my biggest regrets.

(This is a true story. But dont worry bout it. Happened a while back.)
« Last Edit: July 27, 2012, 05:31:27 pm by The Wise one »
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Offline Mylo

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #7 on: July 27, 2012, 05:28:40 pm »
Okay then.  Good luck in your endeavor! :)
Here is a word: were (as in werewolf).

Offline Jet

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #8 on: July 27, 2012, 06:11:27 pm »
Hooray, another taker! :)  Oks....lets try the word dream.  ;)
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PLUR

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #9 on: July 27, 2012, 08:02:32 pm »
Well done..  Here is a word from me. "cornfield"
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Offline Psycho

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #10 on: July 27, 2012, 08:39:59 pm »
(Eh. Go ahead. Knock yourself out.)
Alright, I'm done :P

FYI, the topic of lovers didn't benefit me at all creatively, I took the introduction The Wise One wrote, and turned it into a short story!
I wrote this all off the top of my head.
I didn't think I could write sci-fi either... Guess I can! :P
(Lovers.)

Once, there was a couple. One who had found herself deeply in love. But love cannot be real as it is only an illusion distracting us from the world (you're not supposed to include your own opinions in a story :P). The other saw love just as that. But he did hope to settle down one day and start a family, so that he may be the better example for the next generation to come. You could say he "loved" her in the sense. But it was not love. It was looking to the future of the endless possibilities. The girl asked "Do you love me" and he said no. She started to walk off crying. He stopped her with a gentle grip on her shoulder and gave her a soft smile. He explained to her why twas not love that drove him. It was her personality that made her different and therefore the only bearable person in the world. That she was the only one that mattered to him. That in this world of corruption and darkness, there was a light. She...was that light.
The boy hugged the girl and said "I need some time to think, I'll see you later", the girl did not want to let go.

The boy didn't make any sense to the girl. She wondered how the boy couldn't love her, but had to be around her all the time "I'm the only one person bearable to him" she thought to herself. Still, she did not understand why the boy didn't love her, but didn't want her to leave him. It was almost as if he wanted to spare her her own emotions.

The boy slouched under the gnarled trunk of an old oak tree. He thought about how people could even believe in love, "anything could happen in the future" he thought to himself. In the back of his mind he knew his conviction came from the fear of devotion, but he wanted to see the corruption of the world subside more than anything.

The girl's personality was not the only thing about her good as gold. She was a very beautiful girl too, a delicacy in her own right. One day, while the boy was getting ice cream for the two of them while they hung out in the park, A businessman noticed the girl, and took great interest in her good looks. The businessman approached the girl and asked her if she would move to the big city to model the newest trends in women's clothing for his company. The girl agreed, she thought the boy didn't really care about her at all. The boy got back to the park bench the girl had been waiting, only to be shocked she was no longer there, she had already left in the businessman's flying machine. The boy spent the rest of the day trying to find the girl, but she was nowhere to be seen in the sea of faces he would encounter everywhere in town.

Almost year had passed since the boy had last seen the girl, the boy had fallen into a deep depression. The boy missed the girl too much, he couldn't bear being away from her. The boy realized that she relaxed him enough to think about destroying the corruption in the world, now all he had left were mindless drones and toxic snakes to talk to, he found himself slipping into corruption the more he listened to their poisonous and mindless words. The boy got off work very late one Thursday night, as he walked, he looked at the video screens all over the towering skyscrapers, eventually one of them caught his eye and held it. It was the girl scantily clad in lingre dancing around a pole. The boy was furious! "How could those snakes steal her from me and do this!" He thought to himself. The boy had always hated how the big companies would corrupt women and turn them into objects of pleasure, he knew he could not let the girl continue to work for the company, or she too would become corrupted.

The boy knew that once a woman was signed to a company like that one, they owned her for life. This did not burden him at all, he would take the girl back, and he would do it by force, he knew it was the only way. The boy bought a G719 plasma gun from an illegal arms dealer in the ghetto of the city he lived in, and bought tickets for the public flying machines, he started a very long trip to the big city.

When the boy arrived at the machine terminal in the big city he immediately purchased a map of the area, ate some foodstuffs and then he set straight out to the company that had captured the girl, "they will not own her much longer" he thought to himself. the boy arrived at the company's main building with his G719 in his jacket, the first three floors were open to the public, so he knew he would not have to worry about the armed guards searching him. A drone stopped to talk to the boy about how stressful his job was, the drone hadn't noticed that the boy was just a regular civilian. The boy recognized that he might be able to learn where the girl was if the drone worked in the upper levels of the company. Luckily enough, the drone had a menial job fetching the clothes the models would wear and cleaning the used ones, the boy asked the drone if he knew where the company's models were kept. The drone replied: "Models live floor seventeen why you ask?" "No reason" the boy answered. As the drone got into gravitylift, the boy followed him and when the doors on the lift shut the boy snapped the drones neck and took his passkey.

When the gravitylift reached floor seventeen, the boy used the passkey he had looted from the drone's corpse in order to open the doors. The doors flew open like theatre curtains, two guards spotted the boy in the elevator, they pointed blasters at the boy and shouted "FREEZE! THIS IS A RESTRICTED AREA!" The boy immediately withdrew his G719 and fired a single shot at the two guards, glowing red tendrils shot out from the barrel, they twisted and oscillated through the air menacingly. Each of the guards had been hit by multiple tendrils of plasma, the tendrils that had missed left the walls and ceiling around the guards charred to a crisp. The guards themselves were now nothing more the fragments of charred bone and cooked giblets.

The boy stared down the hallway the guards had been guarding. The hallway had thick steel doors that were locked up tight on each side of the hallway, the doors also had a sliding window on them just large enough to throw a tray of food into, these windows could only be operated from the hallway. The boy took notice of these windows and, from where he had exited the elevator he peered into the first room. What he saw absolutely disgusted him, but he was not surprised. A beautiful drone was chained to the wall of a concrete cell at the waist with absolutely nothing to wear. She was starving, tubes and hoses were sticking out of some of her orifices and limbs in order to regulate her body and keep her alive. The boy slammed the steel window shut and spat. "The girl is in one of these rooms", he thought to himself. The boy continued to look into each and every cell he passed.

When the boy eventually found the cell the girl was being held in, but he was surprised at what he saw inside. The girl was there, but frozen in a chryosleep chamber instead of chained to the wall like the other models. "They must really want to preserve her because she's the most beautiful" thought the boy "she'll last thousands of years before she ages a year trapped in there all the time". The boy drew his G719 and fired seven shots at the door, and then reloaded the weapon. The steel door smashed into pieces, an alarm sounded and the lights in the hallway flashed red. The boy opened the chryosleep chamber and caught the girl, who was already starting to defrost. "WAKE UP! WAKE UP!" the boy screamed at the girl, but it was no use, the girl was unconscious. the boy picked her up over his shoulder and ran down the hallway to the gravitylift he came in from, while the alarms continued to scream at him like banshees.

The boy got to the gravitylift safely, but he could hear the thundering of guard's boots echoing down the hallway after him. He sealed the lift's door with the passkey he had looted and hit the ground floor button. The boy knew he would need to fight his way out, he gently placed the girl down beside the door on the lift, so she would not be in harm's way. The boy crouched down in the center of the gravitylift and stared down the sights of his G719.

Four guards stood in a rectangular formation in the front of the doors, all the civilian drones had been evacuated out of the building, the local enforcers were not called because the company was so rich that their guards were much better equipped than enforcers. The boy caught the first guard of by surprise, he shot him and splattered the upper portion of the guards body all over the remaining three guards, the guard directly behind the one who had been slaughtered took a tendril of plasma to the arm, he dropped his gun and hid behind a desk, clutching his wounded bicep. The boy had jumped behind a desk himself immediately after firing his weapon, two guards slowly closed in on the left and right. The boy stuck out his right arm holding the G719 and fired it, the guard on the Left had his right leg blown clean off. The last uninjured guard dragged the most recently injured guard behind a table and stared down the sights of his blaster at the table the boy was hiding behind. Suddenly the girl in the gravitylift came-to and struggled to stand up and walk out of the lift, her vision heavily blurred. "HALT!" screamed the last guard, the boy peered over the edge of the table to see the girl stumbling around confused and the last guard pointing his weapon at her. The boy quickly blew the guard's head off and slung his gun over his shoulder.

The boy ran to catch the girl, who was about to fall over. "Are you alright?" the boy frantically asked the girl. "Where am I? Who are you?" she replied. "It's ok, you're safe now, come with me so you can recover from everything those snakes have done to you". The boy walked with the girl to the flying machine terminal, and they flew back to their home town. While they were riding the machine, the girl started to regain her memory. "Why did you come for me?" the girl asked. "I'm sorry about everything I said before... You're my sun and the moon and everything in between, you're what I need to focus on how corrupted the world is... You're... You're... I love you more than anything. I was just too afraid of my own emotions to admit it." The girl embraced the boy tightly and cried tears of joy, the boy held her even tighter. "I can't wait for tomorrow" said the girl, "me too" the boy replied, as the the flying machine flew through the amethyst sky and emerald clouds the boy and girl fell asleep together in a loving embrace.
« Last Edit: July 27, 2012, 08:58:20 pm by Psycho »

Offline The Wise one

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #11 on: August 02, 2012, 09:06:51 pm »
(The setting is mid 1800's) (This is the word Were.)

Day 20,

It seems as if this...creature inside of me is taking over more and more each time it manages to gain control temporarily. The creature tends to take over each night that there is a full moon. I am unaware of my surroundings, as if I am almost blinded and my ears are covered when it takes over. I wake up the next morning...horrified; Each morning being worse than the last occasion. I woke up with bodies of women and children surrounding me. I see myself to not be fit but after all, I am needed in this town.

I am the town's blacksmith. The only blacksmith for a five days travel. I have thought about ending my life but I have come up with solutions for every night that I turn. I once made a steel cage that I placed myself within on the night of the full moon. But the morning that I woke I found that the steel cage was useless as I...or the beast more like; had torn the cage in half. There was blood and gore around my workshop in such a manner that I cant even describe the horror. I then heard a knock on my door. I only opened it enough to show my face and nothing more. It was the towns federal authority. They had said that people have gone missing and asked me if I said seen anything strange. I quickly said no and dismissed them. I then proceeded to lay in the corner of my workshop for what could seem like hours, wondering what kind of monster I had become.
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Offline The Wise one

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #12 on: August 03, 2012, 02:36:37 pm »
(This is the word dream.)

I was in a field. It was calm. There wasnt a single cloud in the sky that was in sight. I felt like there wasnt a care in the world. But then, the sky turned a sickly purple and the ground rose to steep cliffs. Between each cliff was molten magma. But I wasnt panicking. Instead, I was hopping from cliff to cliff, wondering where the world would take me next. I closed my eyes on what I assumed would be the last hop. I opened my eyes as a cold breeze hit my face. I looked around me as I found myself in a frozen tundra. I could barely see infront of my own face. I walked and walked until I saw a light coming from what seemed like a log cabin. I walked up to the log cabin and rushed inside as I had wanted to be out of the cold.

As I walked inside, it was not what I had expected it to be. The inside was like a ballroom of a castle, bustling with people in masquerade masks. I looked down at myself to find that my apparel had changed from silk pajamas to ballroom clothing. I looked up, then I found myself to be underwater. I was afraid I wouldnt reach the surface to breath in fresh air...then I woke up.
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Offline Mylo

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #13 on: August 03, 2012, 03:26:36 pm »
Good job Wise. You're getting better at really capturing an experience, especially this one where you detailed the chaos of a dream. :)

New word! new

Offline The Wise one

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #14 on: August 04, 2012, 11:22:19 am »
(Thanks. The thing that gave me inspiration for the dream was watching one of those crazy old spice commercials xD)
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Offline Leeseetsa

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #15 on: August 05, 2012, 11:46:17 pm »
Grotto
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Offline The Wise one

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #16 on: August 18, 2012, 04:00:59 pm »
Well done..  Here is a word from me. "cornfield"

Ohhh! That can be quite the tough one  :P...Welp...Here we go *Cracks knuckles*

The cornfield was a quiet, but deadly place for a field mouse. Around every corner he could turn, a snake could be lurking. Charlie was smarter than this. He hoped to find a way out of the cornfield and live on flat land where he could see the dangers approaching. It had been a year now and about 1/3 of his lifespan he had spent to try and find a way out of the cornfield. But it appeared as much as he had tried to get out, something was stopping him. He had once tried to escape during the winter as he found out snakes would not be around during that time. But the temperatures were freezing and it was snowing too hard for the poor little field mouse. He gave up for the winter and tried the spring. But turns out snakes would be stopping him from going anywhere during almost all the seasons except winter. It was about to reach the second year mark and Charlie was determined to get out. It was now winter season and it was snowing as hard as it was last year. Of course to human standards it was only slightly snowing. Charlie was able to survive this long by climbing up corn stalks and nibbling on the corn as food. This time was different. He plucked some corn leaves from the stalks and wrapped himself in the leaves, trying to stay as warm as possible. He walked for what could seem like days. Just when he was about to give up... he had reached the end of what seemed like the infinite cornfield. He rejoiced and found another field mouse not too long after and was able to start a family. He could now die a happy field mouse.
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Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #17 on: August 19, 2012, 12:18:18 pm »
That was a interesting story for the word cornfield. Nice job
Mr wise.  :orbunny:

How about  "challenge"
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Offline The Wise one

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #18 on: September 13, 2012, 09:09:01 pm »
Good job Wise. You're getting better at really capturing an experience, especially this one where you detailed the chaos of a dream. :)

New word! new

(Alrighty then. Ive got a weird vibe goin on today. Here goes!)

He sat in the classroom wondering what felt so odd about today. Was it something about the class? No...It was the same as ever. Could it possibly be his schedule, his daily routine? No, that was also the same as well. He couldn't put his finger on it. He continued to ponder this throughout his class. He did know one thing, and that was the fact that when he woke up that day he started feeling this sensation. He would always keep his eye on his desk, doing his work somewhat happily. But today felt odd. He let his eyes wander around. He noticed bookshelves that he always knew were there, but never really payed attention to. The things at the corner of his eye he never seemed to notice. He noticed closets and pantries. He had no idea of what they held, but he kept looking at them only at the corner of his eye. He dared not let his eyes wander too far. He was somewhat...Afraid. Which he found to be strange because he was almost never afraid of anything. He just felt shivers down his spine. The day was going by smoothly, but almost too smoothly. He never had days like this and he never expected such a thing. But he still couldn't figure out what was so different. It was like...When he woke up...He woke up in some sort of parallel universe.

He had to get to the bottom of this, but he was too afraid to actually investigate into such a matter. In fact, he didn't even think he could even tell anyone about this feeling. It was as if this whole world was anew. Or perhaps it could be a change in him instead. He was afraid and it wasn't long before he drew things in his notebook. Just simple shapes. At first they started out as shapes, but the more he drew those shapes together, the more they just formed...Closets and...Pantries. This scared him more and drove him to burn his notebooks to which he drew those things in. He didn't know what to think at this point and this was driving him insane to think about it. Every time he would look at the corner of his eye he would see a closet or pantry nearby. But when he looked directly in that direction, it was as if those things weren't even there. He couldn't go to sleep at all for the next couple days, his thoughts keeping him awake. It was as if his thoughts were yelling at him, but they were multiple voices he couldn't understand. He got out of his bed and turned on the light. He was tired of it all. He slowly looked to the corner of his eye. He looked slowly out of fear to see if what he saw was true. When he looked to the corner of his eye, sure enough he saw...a pantry. He kept looking at the corner of his eye, walking sideways closer to it. He reached out slowly to see if he could touch it. It seemed like a stretch that lasted forever, but he soon felt the cold metal knob of the pantry. He stood there for minutes on end, afraid to open the pantry. He slowly slid it open, the door making a loud creaking sound. He couldn't bare to look at the corner of his eye anymore. He looked into the pantry and expected something strange, but instead it was pitch dark. Nothing was in it. But it also seemed like there was no end. He looked inside of the pantry, first leaning in shoulder-first. But soon half of his body leaned in. His waist slipped and he fell into the pantry. Last thing he saw before darkness was the light from his room, getting farther and farther away from his grasp. He then woke up with a daze. He had sweat covering his forehead and he was breathing rather heavily. It took him a minute to regain himself, but he had to see if something was there. He looked at the corner of his eye and...nothing was there. Everything felt right again. He didn't have that sensation anymore. He continues to think about this phenomenon to this day.
« Last Edit: September 16, 2012, 05:45:29 pm by The Wise one »
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Offline The Wise one

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #19 on: September 17, 2012, 06:35:59 am »
Next word is Grotto  :)
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Offline Mylo

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Re: Wise's short story challenge!!!
« Reply #20 on: September 19, 2012, 09:00:00 pm »
Was that some kind of dream you had?  You did a great job translating the experience of this situation into words; the story had a tense-ness to it, like something was always going to happen.  Something bad.  But aside, nice job on the story, and here is another word: foreigner.