Author Topic: Kitsune' on Campus  (Read 1102 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Rukan Hisashi

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Male
  • Posts: 199
Kitsune' on Campus
« on: January 07, 2004, 04:22:27 pm »
well I have a severe lack of webspace so I'll have to be linking this to Kitsunet... sorry

I hope you enjoy it... and please give me some feedback. I hate it when I get nothing from my readers. I tend to stop writing when that happens.
Fine! I'll go to my room! I have lots of video games ^.^

Offline Russano Greenstripe

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Male
  • Posts: 380
Kitsune' on Campus
« Reply #1 on: January 09, 2004, 12:09:23 pm »
Good story. *wurrs* Reminds me of a story I'm working on called Thyklos. There's one copy of it in this forum, and one in my forum. The one in my forum is about to be updated, so check it out and tell me if you wanna get together sometime and to a big write fest.
I like to think
(It has to be! )
Of a cybernetic ecology
where we are free of our labors
and returned to our mammal
brothers and sisters
and all watched over
by machines of loving grace.
          -Richard Brautigan

Offline beyond the darkness

  • Hero Member
  • When darkness falls, allow the light of your heart to guide you
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 2816
Kitsune' on Campus
« Reply #2 on: January 09, 2004, 02:03:54 pm »
Hi, don't think I've met you before so I think it calls for a hug, don't you? LOL
*Pounce and hug*
Now to read the story...
"Beyond the darkness is a door to the light,
A door to your soul...

When darkness falls
Allow the light of your heart to guide you

Hope burns brighter than any star
And will shine long after the last star dies"

My Furry Code : FMF1 A+ C- D+ H++ M P+ R T++++ W Z- Sm RLA/CT/LW/AT a- cn++ d+ e+ f h* iwf+ j++++ p++ sm--

Offline Serafine666

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Female
  • Posts: 2
Kitsune' on Campus
« Reply #3 on: June 21, 2004, 03:43:13 pm »
Sweet story, Ru. Tad long but use wolfy-dragons are resiliant and all. Hmm... what to say that'd be useful constructive
criticism... well, one of the things that got tiresome after a while was the fact that you knew Rukan and Taka were going to hook up but the entire thing got dragged out through like 4 chapters or more. It'd be nice if it either wasn't so apparent that they were destined for one another or if it was just wrapped up a bit more quickly so the reader can concentrate more on the rest of the story instead of being held back by the constant return to the I-think-I-love-him-but-I-dunno theme. I know I may have a rather sharp antenna as a fellow writer and something that most people wouldn't catch is obvious to me but it's just one of my suggestions.

Another suggestion I'd have is try to avoid the Matrix-esque feel to the final battle. You know, two advasaries just randomly duking it out until one goes Mega-Neo and destroys the other. Only problem with my suggestion is that I'm not sure exactly what would be a good replacement; some things are entirely placement and atmosphere. Maybe take a look at that?

In summary, I liked the story, overwrought as it was (entirely natural; love-battle stories are that way by nature notwithstanding writer skill). I'd get a kick out of it if you had a subtitle like "based on a true story" to mess with my head. '<img'>

Amma sae rama deus...

Gunslinger_`-` This is great!
Shockjock|| Huh?
Gunslinger_`-` There's voices in my head.
Shockjock|| So everything's normal?
Gunslinger_`-` ...yeah pretty much.

Offline Simo

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 655
Kitsune' on Campus
« Reply #4 on: July 14, 2004, 01:37:44 am »
I hate it when I get nothing from my readers. I tend to stop writing when that happens.

I've put up a couple of stories here and there. Fortunately, I got this reply from Sabu over at Kitsunet:

I don't read furry stories all that often, although I really should. However, I found that I just couldn't stop reading this one.

A familiar tingling sensation running up my spine whenever a furry memory was brought up, was to match when i was in the process of writing my first furry story


So far, that's the one and only reply I got. So I figure that "no news is good news", and that it's human nature to prefer to say negative things rather than good. So I tend to keep an eye on the number of hits the story gets. If the numbers are good, then I figure that the effort was worth it since it's being read. At least no one said the story SUX  '<img'>
You don't know where you're going until you know where you've been: A Chronology of Furry Fandom
FCtD6afmsw/CF4mw A- C>++ D>+++ H+ M P+++ R+ T- W>++ Z Sm# RLCT/E a+++ clm++++ d-- e++ f+ h+ iwf+++ j p+ sm#