Author Topic: The Stroy With No Name  (Read 2929 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« on: October 22, 2003, 02:53:22 pm »
This is part of a stroy about my furry 'alter-ego' that I'll probably post up here whenever I can in sections. It's gonna have a government conspiracy plot in it (I love conspiracies) that'll end up with the good guy (Havok) working for the bad guys (No definate name yet. Probably The Order). I wrote it when my modem was down and now I'm typing it up into Microsoft Word. Here it goes...

-----------------------------------------------------------

A dim green light filled the room. The humming of a computer fan was broken only by the tapping of keys. The user sat hunched over the keyboard, reading the stream of green on a black screen. The user read the screen?s contents to himself.
   "Name: Unknown
    Alias: Havok
    Race: Wolf
    Sex: Male
    Age: 16
Description: Dark grey fur, scar over right eye, muscled build, always wears          belt holster and backpack.
Background: Requires Level 3 Clearance
Last Known Location: Unknown
Dammit"
   The door him behind slid open and filled the room with a warm, bright light. A female fox leant on the door's frame.
   "Still checking out the Bounty Hunter Register, Armin?" came the fox's voice.
   "Uh huh," Armin replied. "I've told you already, Yomanda, I find it interesting"
   "You need to get out more"
   "You need to look at the records for these people"
   "No thanks, I got a life. And a job. You'd better get back to your job, unless you want another pay cut"
   "Fine. I'll be down in a minute"
   Yomanda left the room and Armin read over Havok's record one more time. He turned off the monitor and closed the door, filling the room with darkness. Armin thought to himself...
   "Being a Bounty Hunter must be so cool"

   A red siren light constantly flashed on and off. Security personnel scrambled to their positions to stop the intruder, their guns aimed at the person. That person was Havok. The security pulled their triggers on their automatic weapons. Havok dived behind nearby crates and drew his Uzis, holding one in each paw. He dived into the open and sprayed lead in the guards direction, every bullet finding it?s mark, killing on impact.
   Havok was skilled with guns. He could hit an ant at fifty feet without a scope. He was also skilled at hacking. He slipped his laptop from his backpack and connected it to the alarm console. A few seconds later, the sirens stopped. He slipped the laptop back into his backpack and drew his Uzis again. His ears pricked up, ready to detect the tiniest sound. He ran from cover to cover, checking for guards with every step. He was a grey blur when he moved. He heard silent footsteps from around the corner, probably from a tiger. Most likely his target.
   He waited for his target to come closer to his position. He had to time it perfectly. He jumped out and caught his target by surprise. The barrels of Havok?s Uzis were almost touching his target's muzzle.
   "Hi there, Motig," said Havok.
   "You? How did you survive the guards?" Motig shouted.
   "Easily enough. I have my way with guns. You should know that."
   "So what you gonna do, shoot me?"
   "Nah. I think I?ll incinerate you."
   He forced Motig into a side room and tied him to a chair. He pulled out his laptop and tapped a few keys. A female voice rang out on the PA system.
   "Self-destruct in T minus five minutes"
   "I'll see you later," said Havok as he left the room. He ran to the dock as fast as he could.
   "T minus three minutes"
   He gathered speed and boarded his ship.
   "T minus one minute"
   He sat in the cockpit and hurriedly turned on the systems.
   "T minus thirty seconds"
   He started the engines and put the throttle to maximum speed. It misfired.
   "crap"
   "T minus ten seconds"
   He reset the throttle and pushed it to max again.
   "T minus five ... four ..."
   His ship lurched forward.
   "... two ... one ... zero"
   An explosion blew the airlock door into space. Havok's ship started to gain speed. Explosions ripped through the station. Havok fired up his afterburners, sending barrels and railings flying. His ship darted forward towards the opening. Flames flanked his fighter vessel, threatening to engulf the ship. The extra boost sent the ship careening out of the station just as the fireball was about to engulf him. The whole station was alight with flames one second, and then reduced to debris the next. Havok's radio came alive with a transmission from a female. Yomanda.
   "You never cease to amaze us, Havok" she said sarcastically.
   Havok grinned at the comment.
   "I'll take that as a compliment. It was a close call. Motig has been eliminated"
   "Roger that, we're transferring the payment now"
   "Good. I don't work for free"
   "But you always seem to work for us"
   "True. You pay the most cash as well"
   Yomanda laughed and simply said, "You just love the cash don't you?"
   "True, but that's what the universe runs on. I'll be in Sigma-17 if you need me?
   "Sure thing. Yomada signing off"

-----------------------------------------------------------

The next section is already being typed up.






FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--

Offline Kada-Ru

  • Species: Golden Blue Pegasus
  • Member Since: 11-29-2002 Web Admin!
  • *
  • Female
  • Posts: 9672
    • Kaycy's Creations
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #1 on: October 23, 2003, 02:27:22 am »
It can't be emphasized enough for writers to proof read their work. Always use a spell checker and then go over it again yourself or have another person read it for errors.

Quote
The door him behind slid open ......


This is an example, Running_Wolf of needing to proof read your material after typing it. It just doesn't sound right to me. It is a simple mistake and can be caught by rereading it. If there are too many errors a reader has troubles concentrating on the story.

Great story by the way! Looking forward to the next chapter!
My avatar was created on 7-24-2000 (one of these days I need to make a new one. LOL)
Furry stuffs:
FurAffinity:  http://www.furaffinity.net/user/orcashia/
http://www.kcff.net

Offline beyond the darkness

  • Hero Member
  • When darkness falls, allow the light of your heart to guide you
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 2816
    • http://www.btd.deviantart.com
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #2 on: October 23, 2003, 08:35:45 am »
I like your style, it's a pretty damn good story, look forward to reading more!
"Beyond the darkness is a door to the light,
A door to your soul...

When darkness falls
Allow the light of your heart to guide you

Hope burns brighter than any star
And will shine long after the last star dies"


My Furry Code : FMF1 A+ C- D+ H++ M P+ R T++++ W Z- Sm RLA/CT/LW/AT a- cn++ d+ e+ f h* iwf+ j++++ p++ sm--

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #3 on: October 23, 2003, 11:56:14 am »
wow! This is my first story and hearing good stuff about it is sweet. Thanks.


FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #4 on: October 25, 2003, 06:36:19 am »
Here's the next section of it.

-----------------------------------------------------------

A few days later, Havok had docked with Freeport 4, a remote base in Sigma-17. He was sitting in the bar, staring at the pale blue nebula hanging in the vastness of space, like a cloud in the sky. Small fighter ships were occasionally cruising in and out of the nebula on their patrol runs, freighters were hauling cargo to Freeport 4 and civilian vessels were constantly appearing out of the Trade Lane ring, docking with the station or flying past, trying to avoid the pirates. That was his bounty, but he needed a client, and in this world, they find you.
   Havok sipped his drink and stared into the darkness of space. Telltale flashes told him that there was a battle going on in that area. A few explosions later, he was staring at the nebula again. He noticed something in the purple-blue cloud. Something small, something shaped like a dart, something almost see-through. It appeared only for a moment, and then disappeared. He had never seen anything like this before. He peered into the nebula, trying to see the craft again. He was concentrating so hard, he never noticed the dog standing next to him.
   "Ahem," came the dog's voice.
   Havok jumped. Not only did the dog sound like a politician, he looked like one too.
   "Bounty Hunter Havok?" the dog said.
   "Yeah. Well, since the last time I checked"
   "Good. I have a job for you if you are interested"
   "Depends on who's asking'"
   "Kristof. Kristof Dukers" he said as he sat opposite Havok.
   "Who do you work for?"
   "Does it make a difference?"
   Havok took another sip from his drink.
   "A great difference. I do nor work for Rouges, Outcasts or anyone like that"
   "Well it will be a consolation to you that I have nothing to do with criminals"
   "Good. How much do I get paid?"
   "It is a high risk mission so we will pay around two-hundred and fifty thousand credits"
   Havok almost spat out his drink
   "Good enough for me. What or who is the target?"
   "A Rouge base in this system. Recon says it is highly defended, but a potential target. We want you to destroy the base by any means necessary. If you accept, you will be given ten-thousand credits in advance to pay for any weapons or maintenance needed for your ship"
   "Who's we?"
   "Not a criminal group if that's what you..."
   "Who's we?" Havok interrupted
   "Sir, if it entertains you, I work for Vermillion Commerce. I have been told to hire you to get rid of the Rouges who have been attacking our convoys for the past few months"
   "I'll take it. The Rouges piss me off"
   "Yes, well please refrain from using vocabulary like that in my presence again"
   "I'll say whatever the heck I want"
   Kristof pushed a wad of green paper across the table towards Havok.
   "There's the advance on the mission. I shall bid you good-day and good luck"
   Kristof stood up and left, leaving havoc to his own devices. Havok pocketed the money and said "Commerce people, always the same" within earshot of Kristof. He glowered and kept moving. Havok had received the reply he had wanted and grinned. He finished his drink and made his way to the docks.
   It was like a mass-metal gathering. Ships of different sizes were everywhere. Large cargo ships hung in mid air like steel bars at a building site while civilian ships darted around like flies to a bad smell. Havok walked up to his ship and examined it. The miniguns on either side were his staple weapon. The rocket launchers and torpedo launchers were just for show, but sometimes brought out for a lightshow. Havok spat on the ground and thought "My ships good enough, Kristof. That cash means nothing to me. The whole bounty does."


FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--

Offline beyond the darkness

  • Hero Member
  • When darkness falls, allow the light of your heart to guide you
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 2816
    • http://www.btd.deviantart.com
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #5 on: October 25, 2003, 06:51:05 am »
Bit of a budding Tom Clancy (or whatever his name is) aren't we, again I thought it was pretty good (warning! shameless link coming up!'<img'> Have you read my little story?
"Beyond the darkness is a door to the light,
A door to your soul...

When darkness falls
Allow the light of your heart to guide you

Hope burns brighter than any star
And will shine long after the last star dies"


My Furry Code : FMF1 A+ C- D+ H++ M P+ R T++++ W Z- Sm RLA/CT/LW/AT a- cn++ d+ e+ f h* iwf+ j++++ p++ sm--

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #6 on: October 25, 2003, 07:11:53 am »
Funny you had to mention Tom Clancy. I like Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell but it does get boring after a while of pointless sneaking. I just put on the cheats and let the bullets fly!!


FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--

Offline beyond the darkness

  • Hero Member
  • When darkness falls, allow the light of your heart to guide you
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 2816
    • http://www.btd.deviantart.com
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #7 on: October 25, 2003, 07:25:08 am »
DO NOT mention Splinter Cell I'm stuck on the first mission for crying out load!
"Beyond the darkness is a door to the light,
A door to your soul...

When darkness falls
Allow the light of your heart to guide you

Hope burns brighter than any star
And will shine long after the last star dies"


My Furry Code : FMF1 A+ C- D+ H++ M P+ R T++++ W Z- Sm RLA/CT/LW/AT a- cn++ d+ e+ f h* iwf+ j++++ p++ sm--

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #8 on: October 25, 2003, 07:42:45 am »
want a hand? I got a strategy guide for it.


FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--

Offline Rikimaru

  • Hero Member
  • Much Love
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1982
    • http://rikimaru2004.deviantart.com
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #9 on: October 25, 2003, 09:31:50 am »
wow great story. i borrowed splinter cell from a mate. it was cool but the endless sneaking made it pretty hard.

i wanna read some of his books as well.

p.s. another good author is Thomas Harris respnsible for the hannibal lector books! mmmm.. liver and fava beans  '<img'>
ANYONE WANNA CHAT? DETAILS ARE IN MY PROFILE!

Truism of the week: Eggs are most likely to be eggs.

I may be human...but i love all

Offline Varg the wanderer

  • Species: Maligator/Tervuren
  • Furtopia cannot be held down!
  • *
  • Male
  • Posts: 2909
    • My writings and leatherwork at SoFurry!
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #10 on: October 25, 2003, 11:35:09 am »
It's good.  I like it, no clue who Tom Clancy is, I'll have to go to the library.
I look forward to seeing more.
 '<img'>
My writings and other stuff: https://varg-stigandr.sofurry.com/

"I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by." - Douglas Adams

"I have sworn upon the altar of God eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man." -Thomas Jefferson

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #11 on: October 25, 2003, 12:19:29 pm »
Tom clancy inspired games like Splinter Cell, Ghost Recon and The Sum Of All Fears. I thought most people would know who he is. He used to work for the CIA and is using his past experience to write books.


FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #12 on: October 25, 2003, 02:34:41 pm »
Here's right up to the end of Chpater one.

-----------------------------------------------------------
Havok entered his ship and sat in the cockpit. He was used to this, sitting and waiting for someone who recognises him to give him a job then disappearing again. Once is space, he saw a glimpse of blue in the nebula. It was that strange ship again, but it was gone before he could head in it?s direction. He continued on until his radio came to life with a male?s voice.
   "The base you need to destroy is at the waypoint in your Neural Net. It's heavily defended from all angles except the top and bottom so that'll be your best vector of approach..."
   Havok stopped listening at this point. He let his instincts take over on these missions. Forget how everyone tells him to do it; he'll go all guns blazing, regardless of the cost. The voice on the radio talked on and on about how best to attack the base while Havok simply ignored it. He activated his cruise engines and entered the asteroid field shielding the base.
   "...come out alive. You should be in visual range of the base and installations around it. You'll need to take them out and any ships that leave the area"
   "Incoming missile" warned the ship's computer.
   Havok cut the cruise engines and turned on his afterburners, heading directly into the missile. He swerved at the last minute, sending the missile into the abyss of space. The base was in full alert now. Guns were being fired everywhere. Havok dodged bullets like raindrops, occasionally firing at the weapons platforms. Missile after missile after missile flew past Havok as he dodged every one of them. Bullets started finding their mark on his ship. He had to destroy the platforms or risk getting destroyed.
   "Incoming missile" the computer warned again.
   "I know!" said Havok as the missile almost clipped his left wing. He launched a missile at the offending platform. It careened through the open area, straight into the platform, blowing it to dust.
   "Incoming missile" the computer warned yet again.
   "I KNOW!!" he shouted.
   This missile hit his right wing and blew it clean off. Havok pounded the control panel, accidentally launching a torpedo into another platform. The torpedo missed the platform but detonated next to it, sending it careening into the base. An explosion ripped through part of the base, sending chunks of metal into the expanse of rock surrounding the base. More bullets whizzed past Havok's hull. He had a brave idea. He swept over to the opening in the station. A torpedo was sent from the launcher on his ship into the station. It would blow it apart. Havok pushed his engines to the limit to get out of the blast radius of the torpedo. He was barely out of range when the station exploded. A vast fireball erupted from the station, engulfing everything around it.
Havok was pleased with is work until he was a single ship escaping from the station. The radio came alive with a voice like a gravel path.
"You destroyed my base! You?ll never get me!"
   Havok activated his cruise engines and pursued the survivor towards Freeport 4. He had almost caught up with him until an asteroid flew into Havok?s path. Angered, he launched missiles into it and blew it to dust before continuing the chase. The ship docked with the station hurriedly, so Havok followed suit, knowing the thrill of a hunt.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 2 coming soon.






FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--

Offline Rikimaru

  • Hero Member
  • Much Love
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1982
    • http://rikimaru2004.deviantart.com
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #13 on: October 25, 2003, 08:01:47 pm »
coming along nicely. watch this space for somethin from me i feel inspired to write sumthin. but its like 1am so i cant b bothered!
ANYONE WANNA CHAT? DETAILS ARE IN MY PROFILE!

Truism of the week: Eggs are most likely to be eggs.

I may be human...but i love all

Offline beyond the darkness

  • Hero Member
  • When darkness falls, allow the light of your heart to guide you
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 2816
    • http://www.btd.deviantart.com
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #14 on: October 27, 2003, 09:36:22 am »
Two things, Story- Very nice!
Two - Can I have that stratedgy guide please?
"Beyond the darkness is a door to the light,
A door to your soul...

When darkness falls
Allow the light of your heart to guide you

Hope burns brighter than any star
And will shine long after the last star dies"


My Furry Code : FMF1 A+ C- D+ H++ M P+ R T++++ W Z- Sm RLA/CT/LW/AT a- cn++ d+ e+ f h* iwf+ j++++ p++ sm--

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #15 on: October 27, 2003, 11:33:24 am »
I just need to find the strategy guide. My mom moved everything around in my room. All I can find is my Matrix Reloaded DVD. That's only because it's in my DVD player.


FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--

Offline beyond the darkness

  • Hero Member
  • When darkness falls, allow the light of your heart to guide you
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 2816
    • http://www.btd.deviantart.com
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #16 on: October 27, 2003, 01:56:38 pm »
Well at least you didn't lose that!
"Beyond the darkness is a door to the light,
A door to your soul...

When darkness falls
Allow the light of your heart to guide you

Hope burns brighter than any star
And will shine long after the last star dies"


My Furry Code : FMF1 A+ C- D+ H++ M P+ R T++++ W Z- Sm RLA/CT/LW/AT a- cn++ d+ e+ f h* iwf+ j++++ p++ sm--

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #17 on: October 28, 2003, 01:51:51 pm »
that reminds me...

I "borrowed" my dad's Last of The Mohicans DVD and I still have to sneak it back.

*puts on thermal/night vision headset*


FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--

Offline Vernsim

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Female
  • Posts: 76
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #18 on: December 24, 2003, 11:21:50 am »
Hey,this stuff is pretty good. I'm writing a story too, so I know that what you wrote must have taken a while to think up. '<img'>
Vernsim:"I like my freaky spirit powers, my little buddy Ollie, my staff,and my gryphon friend.I just don't like the cape. What about you, Ollie?"

Ollie: "Can I have your cape if you don't like it?"

Offline Running_Wolf

  • Hero Member
  • The Spiritual Werewolf
  • *****
  • Male
  • Posts: 1379
    • http://fearfactor.atspace.org/
The Stroy With No Name
« Reply #19 on: December 24, 2003, 11:33:21 am »
Not really. I've got an active imagination.


FCX3rw/CW6s A+ C- D>++++ H+++ M- P+++ R+ T+++ W Z? Sm++/m++ RL- a- cn++++ d++ e-$ f++ h* iwf+++ j+++ p* s--