Author Topic: Who Are You?  (Read 1133 times)

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Offline GetScared

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Who Are You?
« on: August 08, 2012, 02:58:29 pm »
   “Who are you?” a voice rings in your head.
   You ponder the question for only a moment.  You really don’t know.  You don’t even know what you are.  In front of your face is a long, furry, white snout and on the end of it, a yellowish, and very canine nose.
   You examine your surroundings.  You appear to be lying in a small clearing in a forest.  The sky is rather dark.  The long grass tickles your nose and you sneeze.
   “Get up,” the voice speaks again.  “Let me get a good look at you.”
   You first heave yourself up on all fours.  Then, for some reason, you try to support your weight on only your back legs.  As soon as your front paws leave the ground, you topple over.  Wait, paws?  Yes, that’s right.  How silly of you to think otherwise.  You shake your head briefly and then the rest of your body.  You stretch out your legs.  They feel so stiff.  Almost as if you’d been lying here for days.
   You hear the voice again, but not in your mind.  Now it’s behind you.  You don’t know what it said though.  You spin around to see who might be there.  As you twirl, something catches your eye.  It’s following behind you.  It turns with you.  You let out a soul-shattering growl as you chase this fluffy, white thing that evades you so.
   “Oh stop this nonsense!  That’s your tail, dummy!” the voice shouts.
   The mysterious voice was so loud that you jumped at the sound of it.  You felt your ears flatten against your head.  You trip over your paws and end up sprawled out on the ground.
   “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
   Your ears perk back up and you rise to your feet once more.  “It’s alright,” says another voice.  You think it’s yours.  Well of course it’s yours.  You can’t believe you forgot the sound of your own voice for a moment.  You sure feel odd today.  You wonder why.
   “You look hungry.  Would you like something?”
   “No, thank you.  I’m alright,” you reply.
   The voice is quiet now.  It says nothing.
   “Where are you?  Why can’t I see you?”
   “I am hiding.”
   “Why?” you ask
   “Because…”
   “You aren’t afraid of me, are you?” you chuckle.  “I’m not scary.”
   A breeze blows through the clearing.  It ruffled your long fur.  In the wind you catch a scent.  It’s something you’ve never encountered before.  You freeze in momentary terror.  This thing, whatever it is, is definitely huge.
   “What’s wrong?” the voice comes from the same direction as that odour.
   “It’s you!” you whisper to yourself.
   “Please, don’t be afraid.  I won’t hurt you,” the voice sounds different now.  Deeper, colder, larger, harsher.
   Your hackles stand on end at the sound.  You instinctively take a step back.  “What are you?”
   You hear a little bit of rustling coming from within the trees.  All your muscles tense up in fear.  A large, scaly hand pokes out from the brush.  The large claws scare you even more and you start shaking in fear.
   The creature pauses.  “I promise I won’t hurt you.  Please don’t be afraid.”
   You try to swallow back your fear and stand up tall.  You’re scared, but, whatever that thing is, it seems friendly enough.  You carefully sit down in the grass and wrap your poofy tail around your hind quarters.
   “You’re the only one who hasn’t run off.”
   “Why’s that?” you try you best not to let your voice quiver.
   This creature, who you now realize has a very feminine voice, steps out from behind her wooded veil.  Standing before you is an incredibly large reptile.  You don’t remember the word for the kind of animal she is though.  She stands on all fours, but seems capable of standing on only two of her muscly legs.  She has large wings, like a bat’s, and they are pressed snuggly against her back.  Her scales are black on most parts of her body, but the fleshy bits on her wings and the scales on her stomach are a light grey.  The creature has large, grey horns on her head and a long, powerful tail.
   She stares down at you meekly, knowing you’re afraid.  Her nostrils on her large snout flare as she smells the hormones coming off of your trembling body.  Her icy eyes avoid contact with yours.
   “What’s going on here, anyway?  Where am I?”
   “You don’t remember?” she tilts her head in confusion.
   “So you know?”
   She hesitated. “Yes.”
   You look at her suspiciously and she continues to avoid eye contact.
   “Tell me.  What am I doing here?”
   She releases a sigh and flops down on the ground.  Her massive head lies in front of you, at eye level.

*So far this is just my first draft. I'm not totally finished with it, and I was wondering if anybody had any advice on how to improve it or where to go with it. I kind of just started writing this one day, not really thinking about how I was going to end it or anything. I'm not really sure what the purpose is. I just had a bit of an idea and I want to go further with it yet.*

Offline DarkDemon

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Re: Who Are You?
« Reply #1 on: August 08, 2012, 06:26:47 pm »
I thought this was really interesting! :3 Maybe the dragon could be talking to the wolf or dog, and the canine finds out it's in some sort of supernatural world? Maybe figures out it's some type of shape-shifter or has a curse from some deviant that it wronged before it was a dog? :3 Well, these are mai thoughts, please continue writing it. I liked your detail :D
I just got mai computer fixed!! :D :3
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Offline GetScared

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Re: Who Are You?
« Reply #2 on: August 08, 2012, 08:37:28 pm »
I thought this was really interesting! :3 Maybe the dragon could be talking to the wolf or dog, and the canine finds out it's in some sort of supernatural world? Maybe figures out it's some type of shape-shifter or has a curse from some deviant that it wronged before it was a dog? :3 Well, these are mai thoughts, please continue writing it. I liked your detail :D
Thank you so much :3 I'll see if I can work that into the story somehow. Thanks again! :D

Offline DarkDemon

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Re: Who Are You?
« Reply #3 on: August 10, 2012, 01:38:06 am »
No problem :3 I'd love to see how this turns out when you've finished, or if you need help, I'm sure I or any other furry would be glad to help :)
I just got mai computer fixed!! :D :3
Surrender the peanuts!
ScourgeFur on DeviantArt! :D
:goldlaugh:

Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Who Are You?
« Reply #4 on: August 10, 2012, 11:50:08 am »
A interesting story idea. Keep up the good work. :orbunny:

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Offline GetScared

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Re: Who Are You?
« Reply #5 on: August 10, 2012, 12:13:52 pm »
No problem :3 I'd love to see how this turns out when you've finished, or if you need help, I'm sure I or any other furry would be glad to help :)
Yeah, thanks. Once it's finished I'll post the finished product in this topic again :3

Offline GetScared

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Re: Who Are You?
« Reply #6 on: August 10, 2012, 12:14:09 pm »
A interesting story idea. Keep up the good work. :orbunny:


Thank you :3