Author Topic: Why the need to tell about furry?  (Read 77413 times)

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Offline Kobuk

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Why the need to tell about furry?
« on: September 12, 2010, 03:11:30 pm »
*takes off Admin badge while I post the following*

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Seriously, W..T..H?  :o After nearly 7 years in the fandom, I just don't get it, and I don't think I ever will.  :P I just don't understand the mindset of today's youth (Anywhere from 12 to about early 20's) where some of them feel like they NEED to come out to friends and family about being furry. THERE IS NO "NEED" , FOLKS! If you feel like you absolutely MUST tell people about being furry, then you're making the issue much bigger than it needs to be and you're blowing things way out of proportion. Do yourself a favor and chill and calm down.

Let me give the younger generation a couple quotes from other threads by members from long ago:


Quote
I have a query, why?  Why did you feel the need to "tell your parents you're a furry?"

Honestly, the fandom is just a hobby.  There is no need to "come out about it".  Would you "come out" as a stamp collector?  No!  Furry is no different.

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Everyone is so seriously nervous and seemingly paranoid about being furries! Whats to be afraid of? If for you furry isnt a sexuality, religion, or way of life, whats to fear? Tell everyone what you are and forget about what you arent! What is being a fur to you, ask yourself this. Then repeat your answer to all who might ask when you figure it out!

Well, still, if its something youre ashamed of in any way, or should be so dang cautious about, then should you be doing it? If you're going to do something, you have to accept the consequences, and then go on and enjoy it! I just hope this kinda helps around here.

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1.) There is no anti-fur conspiracy.

2.) Your parents most likely don't even know WHAT furry is, let alone care.  Even if they have heard about it they don't know what it is.  Or care.  No one else does, either (except for people IN IT).  There is no furry closet.  If, for some reason, you NEED to tell them to make them understand, YOU ARE ALREADY MAKING TOO BIG A DEAL OUT OF IT.  If you start obsessing about stuff then OF COURSE it looks weird.

3.) If you make these problems up, THEY WILL EXIST.  If you don't, they will not.  If you say to your friends "I'm into cartoons and animals and stuff" I really doubt they will think anything of it.  If you say "I found out I'm a furry, and I'm not in it for the secks and stuff but I needed to tell you because I think it changes things a lot and I hope you don't hate me, yadda, yadda, yadda....." then they will think it's weird.

There is a pattern developing here.  Make a big deal out of it and it becomes one.  Don't and it never will....

Quote
There is one part about coming out about furry that I don't understand. I've read some posts here at Furtopia and elsewhere in the past where furs/people are over the age of 18, are an adult, are out living on their own and not living with parents, but yet are still worried about coming out of the furry closet? I don't get it? If you've met the criteria above, then certainly you can do whatever you want with your life, right? Only you have to deal with the consequences of your actions whether they be bad or good. No one else has the right to tell you what to say or do or how to act. You're an individual and you have freedom. Use it. If you want to enjoy furry and wear your tail and also talk about furry to friends or maybe draw furry artwork while someone is watching you, then go ahead and do these things. Who cares what others think. IT'S YOUR LIFE, NOT SOMEONE ELSE'S.

On the other paw, if you're over 18, an adult, but yet still living with your parents, then things might be slightly different. Yes, you're an adult and have freedoms and can do whatever you want. But if you're living in your parent's house, they may still have rules about what you can and can't do and are probably still concerned about how you will live your life.

Now if you're under 18 and living with your parents, that's an entirely different ballgame. Parents have a right to ask what their children are getting into and naturally will be overly concerned and suspicious of new things. Face it, the things like Internet, raves, drug use among teens, etc. probably didn't exist much, if at all, back in the days when your parents were growing up. A lot has changed over time and parent's attitudes and suspicions about stuff change also. A parent only wants to see that their children grow up and live a happy normal life as best as possible. Parents only want the best for their children. If you hide or deny something, then they will get suspicious and ask about it and also probably not want you getting into whatever that something is. But if you talk openly about furry without making a big fuss over it, then maybe they'll understand and will let you get involved in it.

If you hide or deny furry, then that equals SUSPICION, FEAR, & PANIC.

If you talk about furry openly, wear your tail, show your artwork, etc., then maybe there will be more openess and understanding.

Which do you want?

Seriously, Why the need? Why must a kid/teen feel like they have to come out to a friend/parent about being furry? Is it because you feel like you'll be accepted more? Is "acceptance" the big reason here? Do you think people will find you more cool or fun to hang around with if you share your interests with other people? What is the real reason? Why? Why? WHY?
If you think your friends and family will not be accepting of your interest in furry, THEN DON'T TELL THEM! Sheesh! Don't tell them you want a collar, Don't tell them you want a fursuit, Don't tell anything "bad" that happens in the fandom, etc.
And if buying/wearing a collar, ears, etc. freaks your parents/friends out, then don't wear it around them. Save that stuff for when they're not around or for when you move out of the house.

I just don't understand the need. For those that feel like they HAVE to come out of the closet, let me ask you this: If it's not about being "accepted/acceptance", then does it have anything to do with peer pressure and/or the feeling that someone or something is making/pushing you to tell other people about being a furry?


If for any reason people do need to explain the furry fandom to friends and family, then here are some sample links to websites and videos with lots of informative information about "anthropomorphics".


http://www.xydexx.com/anthrofurry/
http://www.visi.com/~phantos/furrysoc.html
http://www.tigerden.com/~infopage/furry/
http://www.humantruth.info/furry.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Furry_fandom
http://www.anthrocon.org/about-furry
http://en.wikifur.com/wiki/WikiFur_Furry_Central

Presenting Furry Fandom to the Public, Anthrocon 2009
Part 1 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2DSc8GHl5g
Part 2 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPeDc2wdZ9Q&feature=related
Part 3 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6azE7IDmTbY&feature=related
Part 4 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L1m_vfNFWkM&feature=related
Part 5 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPAmlZpuf-s&feature=related
Part 6 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gcTrlMDO7_0&feature=related
« Last Edit: July 26, 2012, 07:31:11 pm by Kobuk »

Offline 489109

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #1 on: September 12, 2010, 03:37:35 pm »
I actually agree with most of what he says. Of course, I see the furry world through ruby colored glasses and i know how to tell people about the fandom and my role in it. When i do talk about it to someone, like my OCS class last drill, its followed by about 4 or 5 minutes of questions, then its back to business as usual and no one thinks any different of me.

Offline DrysKale

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #2 on: September 12, 2010, 03:52:14 pm »
I remember finding out about the fandom through 2 the ranting gryphon, never heard of it anywhere else before. I also remember that he used to make a big deal about furries getting harassed, but I never saw this harassment.  It wasn't until I asked some other forum buddies about it, and found out that its nothing but self creating drama.

The only time I've ever " come out" as a fur was when I went to Indyfurcon, and that was only because my family was interested in where I was going for the weekend. I didn't make a big deal about it and all was fine. Half my work knows I like Anthro and fantasy art because I sketch all the time in the breakroom and even talk about it when asked ( big hint, I don't make a habit of telling people).

On the other hand, I had a friend at my work who I got interested in the fandom, but because of his self esteem issues, made a big deal about it not being freaky. I eventually calmed him down, but it was his own fault people where creeped out.

Oh well.

Offline Kr2i

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #3 on: September 12, 2010, 04:09:00 pm »
I agree and I am part of the younger generation I don't get it either why others need to tell everyone
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Offline LordFenrir

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #4 on: September 12, 2010, 04:12:55 pm »
You are a hero Mr Green Husky!  Lord Fenrir must get around to knighting or lording you sometime ;)

Furry is, as my quote suggests (for Lord Fenrir is proud of his stance on the matter) merely a hobby, no matter how "into it" you may think you are.  I guarantee you I am just as "into it" as some of you new furs.  I draw furry art almost exclusively, I use furry vocab in public, I wear my tail in public most of the time when I'm not at work, OK, I'm as furry as it comes before it becomes creepy.

The fact of the matter is that I never, EVER "came out" to anyone as a fur.  Granted, my family is pretty open about a lot of stuff, but I never explained it, therefore I never explained the fandom by what it is NOT.  

I repeat this, for it is a mistake most new furs make:

NEVER EXPLAIN FURRY BY WHAT IT IS NOT!!

The example I use is the "motorcycle enthusiast".  Let's say you come up upon a "motorcycle enthusiast" group in all their black leather clad, chained, tattooed, etc etc etc glory and you ask "What is this?"  They will respond "We are motorcycle enthusiasts".  I bet at least half will say "So you're a motorcycle gang?"  Let us assume the response is then "Oh no, we're not a gang!  It's actually a little known fact that most of us do not engage in gang violence, and the rape and murder is only a small part of what it's all about."

What is the first image and thought in your head now.

Personally, I am thinking I want to get as far as I can away from this man.  Chances are, most of you would too, since the image has already been planted, and it's of murder, rape and violence, even though he said it is only a small part of what they did.

Furries "coming out" usually explain it by what it is not.  "We don't all have sex in animal costumes; it's only a small part of what we do."  If you weren't a fur, what is the first image you'd think of if someone explained the fandom like that.

Food for thought.

Offline furtopia02

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #5 on: September 12, 2010, 04:13:09 pm »
I actually told mine because hiding fursuit construction in my bedroom and never allowing anyone in there and spending mass amounts of hours without coming out of there was getting to be suspicious and questions were being asked. I finally goofed and forgot to clean up a mess of fur from where I cut something out in the den rather than the bedroom when no one was home and then it REALLY got weird. I am not one to lie and make up some ridiculous story about what I was doing instead why I was building a mascot outfit essentially. Lying isn't a good thing to do to your family. Neither is being super secretive of your interests. Parents will assume something bad is going on (notably drugs, and illegal things) and worry about what you are doing, often leading to snooping around while you are gone instead. Snooping around and turning up 'animal costumes' etc would usually lead to a Google search by the more tech savvy parents possibly leading to more assumptions that are not accurate for the individual. Now they are faced with repairing their reputation with their family that would have never been scarred if it had been more open and just part of daily like (e.g. "Yeah, I like horror movies").

If anyone feels the need to HIDE their furry interests like its a dark secret.. then well... sounds more like it isn't so innocent afterall and might BE a dark secret. Sure, hide that if you feel that way about it. If you knew they'd hate you for it because of something you do in the fandom then yeah.. you probably wouldn't want to tell them if their assumptions were true anyway (or not as bad as what was really going on). I hate how everyone acts like liking furry art has to be hidden from people because "OH NO THEY JUST WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND and it might cause conflicts!!". Don't shove it in people's faces like you are fighting for equal rights or some stupid junk, but if they ask then don't act like they just asked you to tell your inner most fantasies to an audience of 500 people. If its deeper than what you'd want everyone to know then don't go that deep.

I mean really.. if its being preached that most people don't hate furries (which is true) then why on earth are people so dang protective about their 'dark little secret'? I was worried about telling my family what I had been doing because it already was something built up badly from hiding it. If I had been open from the start I wouldn't have even been nervous. Now that they know I like furry stuff its barely even mentioned (the FURRY word) at all but they don't bug me about what I am doing, I can carry boxes of fur and stuff around the house without being sneaky, heck - my mom has taken photos of me in fursuit before, so has my brother. Its fun, and they actually really like it. Mom has furry art on her computer now too that she sets as wallpapers every now and then. My brother even messes around in furry fandom now, and I found out my cousin has had an FA account for as long or longer than I have. *shrug* It's just an art driven fandom. It is nothing to be ashamed of and feel dirty about all the time. Its also not something that needs to be 'fought for' in public like you are being oppressed - both attitudes are equally ridiculous, imo. I can tell someone I like furry or anthro art just the same as I can tell them I like nature photography. Mentioning it casually in related conversation is NOT making a big deal out of it - HIDING it sure does though.

Offline Shim

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #6 on: September 12, 2010, 04:15:20 pm »
Now if you're under 18 and living with your parents, that's an entirely different ballgame. Parents have a right to ask what their children are getting into and naturally will be overly concerned and suspicious of new things. Face it, the things like Internet, raves, drug use among teens, etc. probably didn't exist much, if at all, back in the days when your parents were growing up. A lot has changed over time and parent's attitudes and suspicions about stuff change also. A parent only wants to see that their children grow up and live a happy normal life as best as possible. Parents only want the best for their children. If you hide or deny something, then they will get suspicious and ask about it and also probably not want you getting into whatever that something is. But if you talk openly about furry without making a big fuss over it, then maybe they'll understand and will let you get involved in it.

If you hide or deny furry, then that equals SUSPICION, FEAR, & PANIC.

If you talk about furry openly, wear your tail, show your artwork, etc., then maybe there will be more openess and understanding.

Which do you want?

That's precisely why.

I have no problem talking about it with friends, because..To me, its really not that big a deal. On the other hand, I feel as though my family are the ones blowing it way out of proportion. My parents feel as though its going to ruin my life, if I let it get further than the internet (Cons, wearing a tail, or even a collar for that matter). I don't make a big deal over it at home, but I wish my parents understood what it is I'm trying to convey: "Its not that big a deal. Its really no different than going to any other con." But something is lost there, and doesn't connect.

Offline Nicholai

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #7 on: September 12, 2010, 04:16:10 pm »
I agree with most of what you say Kobuk (save for your choice of big red and yellow text  :D ) but to play devil's advocate, everybody sees the fandom differently.

The idea of 'fandom is a hobby' vs. 'fandom is a way of life' started with the sci-fi community, but it applies to furries as well. For a lot of people, the fandom represents a major part of their identity, and not just a 'casual thing.' For those people, it's a lot harder to bottle it up  and say 'nobody needs to know.'

From wikipedia:

Quote
In political, casual, or even humorous contexts, "coming out" means by extension the self-disclosure of a person's secret behaviors, beliefs, affiliations, tastes, and interests that may cause astonishment or bring shame.

People 'come out' about all sorts of things; their sexuality, political and religious beliefs, so on. A lot of times they know it will get them into trouble, but they still do it. This is because nobody likes to hide a major part of their identity from people they know and love.


Quote
Would you "come out" as a stamp collector?  No!  Furry is no different.
Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. You come out as a stamp collector by saying 'I collect stamps' and that's the end of it. The only reason we are having this discussion is because nobody knows what the word 'furry' means. When someone wants to come out of the furry closet, they have to explain it. It's this explanation that gets people into trouble.

I come out of the furry closet all the time. When someone asks me 'what do you do in your spare time' or 'what are your hobbies' one of the many thing I'll say is 'cartoon animals.'  There! Done!

To quote me:

Quote
Never use 'buzz words' to explain the furry fandom, it confuses people and ups the 'weird factor'.
- Say 'cartoon' not 'anthro' or 'furry'
-say 'character' or 'persona' not 'fursona'
-say 'costume' not 'fursuit'.

« Last Edit: September 12, 2010, 04:21:02 pm by Nicholai »
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Offline furtopia02

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #8 on: September 12, 2010, 04:27:24 pm »
The idea of 'fandom is a hobby' vs. 'fandom is a way of life' started with the sci-fi community, but it applies to furries as well. For a lot of people, the fandom represents a major part of their identity, and not just a 'casual thing.' For those people, it's a lot harder to bottle it up  and say 'nobody needs to know.'

Never use 'buzz words' to explain the furry fandom, it confuses people and ups the 'weird factor'.
- Say 'cartoon' not 'anthro' or 'furry'
-say 'character' or 'persona' not 'fursona'
-say 'costume' not 'fursuit'.



Yep, I guess I should have noted in my own post that even though I have a coupe fursuits I made and like furry art I do not consider myself "a furry". I LIKE furry STUFF. It's not "me". I don't consider myself any particular label. I guess if some where to come close as a general "me" description it would be entertainer, or artist. I love to entertain people - whether that be with my art, my music, my videos, stories, etc. I get the most joy from making things others find pleasure and joy in. As far as fandom stuff goes I'm decently involved with Pokémon fandom (after all that's why I'm around furry fandom since many artists and writers hang out on FA essentially). So yeah.. I'm not worried. I've worn a fursuit in public, not at a con, around hundreds upon hundreds of people (somewhere between 1 and 2 thousand or so). I even had to give my license and get ID'd by police to get permission to do it. If I were worried about anyone finding out what I enjoy I wouldn't have done that.

You are right on with that last part. I've shown my costumes to tons of people when talking about halloween stuff and drama things. People love sharing theirs too. Never even had someone go "OMG A FURRY!" when I've shown them on my phone here. I had ONE person at that day fursuiting ask me if I was a furry (other than the other furries I ran in to walking around) to which I nodded and he said "Oh man!! awesome!! Can't I get a photo with you?". Which naturally I let him, and the other 200 people or so that I posed with that day for photos. *shrug*

Offline Kobuk

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #9 on: September 12, 2010, 04:31:10 pm »
Others will have differing opinions/descriptions, but here's my thought on the following:

Don't say furry, but instead use the word(s) "anthropomorphics" and/or "cartoon animals".

If you want a fursuit, tail, ears, then say it's for Halloween.

If you're going to get a collar for any reason, then say that you're making a "bracelet" out of it instead or using it for some other art craft project. ;)

If you like drawing non-adultish "anthropomorphic" artwork, then why hide it? Let your friends and parents see for crying out loud. Why feel ashamed about it if it isn't perverted in any way?

As has been mentioned before, DON'T tell friends/parents/etc. about any of the bad aspects of the furry fandom. Tell them about the good things instead like fursuit bowling, charities the fandom helps with, etc.

If you want to go to a con and need to tell your parents, then tell them it's a "science fiction/fantasy" convention, not a furry convention. Or just say it's a convention dedicated to the history and interest of anthropomorphics. Seriously, the furry fandom is an offshoot of the sci-fi/fantasy/anime genre's.
« Last Edit: September 12, 2010, 04:44:39 pm by Kobuk »

Offline Alsek

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #10 on: September 12, 2010, 04:43:28 pm »
I agree.

I think on some level it gets to be a little more important to most folks than just a hobby though...  This may not be the case for everyone,   but there came a point in time where i realized that between here,  IRC (several networks),  DA,  drawing,  and skyping with furs,   that furry had become my,  "main hobby."

It's now just,  "what i do."  I also have a few other hobbies but i don't spend nearly as much time,  energy,  or thought around any of them.  It's important to me,  and it does seem weird that no one around me knows about it...  At all.  I think that builds up every time someone asks you what you do with your hobbies are and you purposeful omit the thing you do the most.

When that builds up,  it seems like a much bigger deal to folks than it really is...  All people need is a little reality check now and then to push things back into perspective.  That doesn't mean it's difficult to understand why someone was making it a bigger deal than it was.



Personally i just kind of let my folks figure it out...  There was a little stress and a little tension over it (honestly) for a little while but it's died down and things went exactly back to how they were.  It was worth it to me.  I avoid topics like fursuits as much as i can but it's still nice to be able to say,  "my online friend told me this today," or,  "oh hey,   look at this drawing,"  every once in a long while...   ^.^
« Last Edit: September 12, 2010, 04:45:13 pm by Alsek »

Offline Murkrow

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #11 on: September 12, 2010, 08:30:45 pm »
eh, i let my parents figure it out. but they only know so much.  ;)

but i think its a more "i see myself as a different species than what i really am." kinda deal, in some cases. you see yourself as this species for so long, it gets to the point where you wanna tell somebody so badly what you see yourself as, & hope that they dont think your crazy. that fear seems to drive someone to say "will they accept me if they think im crazy for wanting to be something else?" & then the whole thing escalates into a problem with emotions & stress, & you know where it all goes.

idk, thats how i sees it. *shrugs*
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Offline Sigurd Volsung

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #12 on: September 13, 2010, 12:39:25 am »
At one point Spirit said something to the effect that her mother brought up the subject of furries being 'dirty perverts, who do things that should never be mentioned in public/ or something to that effect, I really don't want to dig around and look for the direct quote. I sent her as link to a news article where a report went under cover, since fur-cons don't allow the media in for reasons that are understandable. The article said, to put it simply, that furries are normal people who like talking animals, and that anything adult is kept away from youngsters like what is done at other cons, (Having been to Gen Con it sounds that the fur con she went to did a better job of keeping kids away from adult material). She even went to the furball and was amazed that a parent was sitting back watching his three year old daughter dancing with the fursuiters. He told her that he could trust the people at the con and that for his daughter the people in fursuits were just giant plush toys come to life. The report went in to the con looking for sleaze but her report simply said that we were normal people with a relatively unique hobby.

I have said before that yes I do talk to some of my coworkers about being furry and have even shown them some of the tame stuff I have on my lap top (Though one guy got a little goody over a picture of two femmes in bikinis sitting on a log, not goofy in a bad way more like a twelve year old looking through his dad's stack of Play Boys then again he's just strange). I treat it like any other hobby I don't give a Delta about you fantasy football draft, so don't talk to me about it with out expecting me to talk to you about one of my hobbies.
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Offline Alsek

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #13 on: September 13, 2010, 02:33:50 am »
Quote from: Jennifer Abel
“Every half-hour I went to the bathroom to take notes in a private stall, and at 9 p.m. wrote: "May as well have gone to a Catholic school Halloween party."

—Jennifer Abel, Hell Hath No Furries

^.^


But yeah... I have serious doubts that anyone with irrational,  illogical,  or unfounded opinions are going to be convinced forcefully with evidence.  If they weren't using logic in the first place it's doubtful they'll do in while being confronted.  It does happen on rare occasion though.
« Last Edit: September 13, 2010, 02:37:34 am by Alsek »

Offline Acton

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #14 on: September 13, 2010, 03:07:47 pm »
Kobuk, it is obivious you are not a parent, and you advice is wrong will cause more problems in a Parent child relationship  If a parent  is worth their salt, they would want to  keep tabs what their children is doing. It come with the job of being a parent. Lying or hiding ones furriness is the worst thing a child can do. The parent is going to assume the worst if the child is lying to them.

This goes true as an adult child; I had to explain furry to my mom because of the unusual time I was home and going to Rainfurrest 2007. I never was home on a Thursday and left on Friday Morning. Furthermore if mom came to my apartment I would have to explain my choice in decoration.

The best way to explain fury to parents or when engaging in furry activity in public is to keep it simple, "I am a fan of fictional cartoon animals".

Offline Serra Belvoule

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #15 on: September 13, 2010, 05:59:43 pm »
That's some big text you've posted there, buddy >>;
I think it's important for some people to be honest about what they are, and that includes letting them know you're into furries...
I don't know, I never had the interest of letting people know I'm furry or gay or into math. It's something that might or might not come out in a conversation, and if it does I wouldn't hide it (most of the time), but I'm not one to write in my presentation card "Serra, furry & gay. Also psychologist."
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Offline redyoshi49q

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #16 on: September 13, 2010, 06:16:15 pm »
I did tell my parents about furry.  I told them for several reasons.

  • I wanted to be open with them about my life.
  • My parents (my father in particular) have higher-than-average concerns for my safety.  They would not have let me go to a con unsupervised.

The conversation went relatively well.  Since then, I've been to two cons with my mom (my aforementioned supervision), and I plan on going to a third.

From what I've seen, many furries who enter the fandom and contemplate "coming out" consider an antagonistic response to be more likely than it actually is because of the availability heuristic.  Put simply, "furry bashing" is more commonly noted by furries, and thus can seem more common to furries than it is.

I don't think that people should feel like they have to hide furry from their family/friends, nor do I think that people should feel obligated/forced to say anything, either.  The decision on this should be dependent on various factors, such as family/community values/tolerance, age, relevance to the relationship in question, and the degree to which furry is a part of individual identity.

I also agree with the "talk about what furry *is*" paradigm.  The availability heuristic applies to those you talk to as well, and what's available to them is what you say.
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Offline Sigurd Volsung

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #17 on: September 14, 2010, 03:39:48 am »
Hotel the only reason I told my parent's that I was furry I was stuck in the car with them and needed to find something to talk about so I brought the subject up when they asked me what I was up to. I simply told them that at the moment along with several other projects I was working on a furry story. When they asked what a furry was I told them and they merely found it interesting and unsurprising since I had always been a little strange over my, at the time, twenty-eight years of life.
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Offline Avan

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #18 on: September 14, 2010, 10:16:21 pm »
Thank you for posting this kobuk. I rather did want to say it, but... I don't have an admin badge. I doubt I could have gotten away with big-font usage :D
Seriously, people making such a big deal out of this (being a furry) only makes problems worse. Why do you need to come out? Exactly.
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Offline Serra Belvoule

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #19 on: September 15, 2010, 10:35:26 am »
Thank you for posting this kobuk. I rather did want to say it, but... I don't have an admin badge. I doubt I could have gotten away with big-font usage :D
Technically you can, if you're not spamming, post in any color, font or size that furtopia allows, if I recall correctly.
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Offline Avan

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #20 on: September 15, 2010, 10:45:55 am »
Technically, but I would just end up making myself look like a drama-inducer  :D
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Offline NX01class

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #21 on: September 16, 2010, 01:22:54 am »
Personally, I was never going to tell anyone, but I eventually did and frankly, I've never had any problems from anyone.  If anything, I'm getting more curiosity from others about the fandom.  Now, would I go out and loud mouth it to just anyone, no I wouldn't.

Entire family knows about me being furry.  None of them care.  Actually, my grandma is really interested in the topic.  lol

I understand your POV, but that also comes with how you grew up.  I grew up with a very understanding family and friends.  I'm straight, but if I were to tell them I'm gay or something, they'd accept it.  Sure they wouldn't understand it, but none the less, they'd accept it if that's what I was, which I'm not.

Just my 2 cents.

Offline Bai

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #22 on: September 16, 2010, 04:35:48 am »
I guess younger kids that live with their parents don't like thinking they're hiding something they consider a big part of their lives, in case their parents find out a different way and have a negative reaction to it. I've told other people about furry because I thought a few might be interested in it. Both my parents know, mum thinks its normal - lol!

Offline Sky Striker

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #23 on: September 16, 2010, 05:17:12 pm »
I'd like to tell my friends just because I'd like them to know. It's good for your friends to know things about you. Of course it's never really come up in conversation so I haven't really had the chance.
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Offline Apollo the Incinermyn

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Re: Why the need to tell about furry?
« Reply #24 on: September 17, 2010, 11:40:22 am »
Yeah, I'm one of those young folks who felt the need to 'tell' everyone he knew that he was a furry, but rather than being so outright I just said that I was interested in the fandom on Facebook and was wondering if anyone I knew knew anything about it.  Surprisingly, nobody had a clue, and one of my friends basically said "if you like, try it.  Who cares what others think?"  And, that's just what I did...

In retrospect, though, I agree with everything that's been said up to this point (particularly by Kobuk).  There's no need, one shouldn't feel the compulsion to announce their furrydom to the world, and if the need arises (which it most likely won't), don't make a bigger deal out of it than need be.  As far as my parents were ever concerned, the only time fandoms became an issue were when they started manifesting themselves outside the internet (case in-point: they knew I was into Pokemon for years and I didn't actually start getting into the fandom stuff until a few years ago, most of which is limited to online activities because nothing Pokemon or anime related really happens in or near the area I live at.  The same goes with furry stuff too; though it's only my dad who really knows about it, my mom suspects something and doesn't know what I'm into for sure yet...but that might be ending soon since I'm almost ready to get materials I need to start making the fursuits I've been planning on for a little while now).