Author Topic: Paws's short story challenge  (Read 32284 times)

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Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #75 on: November 12, 2012, 06:23:11 am »
darnit! its getting late! Caffeine ACTIVATE!!!


He sits in the back of the classroom, all alone. Like some sort of unwanted smell that everyone is avoiding. The teacher says we are not to talk about him and treat him like any other normal human being. But we can't help but wonder what exactly resulted in a perfectly normal human ending up with a tail, big pointy ears, claws, fur and a muzzle. Teacher hinted to us that he was from overseas and involved in a genetics project that backfired, with no remaining family members there he was sent to live with his long distance uncle just down the road from the school.

Recess came around faster than expected, and with quadratic equations still haunting my mind i grabbed my snack and headed down to the cricket nets with my friends.
Nathan had just smashed his third ball and send it hurtling out of the boundary and down the street before asking; "How long has that guy been here anyway?"

"About a week now, but I've never talked to him nor caught his name" I replied.

"Strange fellow, besides the obvious. He keeps to himself a lot. Though I have seen him comment once or twice on some of the more complicated subjects in biology and science."

"You're not wrong, he's a bright kid."

Ben pointed with one finger and said in a low voice; "Oi, pipe down he's right over there!"
I snatched a glance in the direction that Ben was pointing toward the Vulpine figure slowly making his way toward a wooden bench to presumably eat his lunch.

"I think it's Shaun's turn, don't you Ben?" said Nathan cocking his head at me and then the lonely individual.

"What?" I complained.

"Go on, Go talk to him. Invite him over for a few bowls or something"

"Alright then, but it sure as hell ain't my turn next time!" I said as I turned toward the....well I suppose i can call him a fox, Even if he was human once.

When I was still a good ten meters away his ears twitched slightly, one rose and aimed at me, alerting him to my approach. I closed the distance a little more cautiously.
He looked up, his blue eyes bright in the hot Australian sun. I nodded the traditional stranger greeting toward him. He stared at me for a brief moment, analysing my body language, then nodded the greeting in return. With this modern day ritual over I moved closer and sat down on the bench, allowing him a few feet of personal space.

"I suppose you're here to ask questions?" He said, voice cold and icy with a hint of sadness. His analysis of my body language had cut clean through the inquisitive gestures i was trying so hard to suppress.

"I would be partly lying if i said no, My name's Shaun" I said, extending a hand to shake. A small smile quivered up the fox's muzzle and he took my hand in his 'paw' and shook. As we did so I could feel the rough compacted callused areas against my palm, much like that of a dog's and his claws lightly pressed against my wrist as our hands moved up and down in unison.

"Name's Ashley, but my net-friends all call me Firefox" said Ashley. "Do I really have to explain myself?" he whined.

"Actually I came over here to invite you over to the nets for a few rounds of cricket, would you like to join us?"

"Beats sitting here alone I can tell you" he said then stuffed half of his sandwich into his large mouth and stood up.

I got up and lead him back to my friends who were both huddled together like a couple of scared rabbits, It was such an amusing sight to see.
"Err, Hi" squeaked Ashley, trying to sound brave. Unfortunately his flattened ears and stiff tail gave away his emotional state even if he had announced himself with a bit more vigor.
None of us were of any help to his predicament as we kept staring at his visible body parts, from the small hole in the back of his school shorts to allow a tail to the movement of his ears as they twitched and moved in reaction to unheard sounds.

"Maybe I should just..." he was cut off as Nathan shoved the bat into his hands.
"Your bat mate, i'll bowl a few easy ones to start you off" he said with a grin.

Ashley took the bat and wandered into his position. I took up place behind the stumps ready to catch any missed balls, which I expected a few. But Ashley seemed to know what he was doing. He had himself positioned well, hips and knees slightly bent.
Nathan started his lead up run, I could tell it was going to be a low spin ball so I prepared myself. Nathan released the ball and it came hurling down the pitch toward the crease. It bounced once then began to curve downward. Ashley swung the bat and to all our surprise it connected right in the middle, sending the ball rocketing back the way it had come. It screamed past Nathan's head like a bludger from the harry potter movie and proceed to sail toward the boundary line.

"Nice one!" exclaimed Ben, clearly astonished.

"Er, thanks I guess. I've never even played before" said Ashley.

Nathan's expression went completely blank, I'd never seen it before. But Ashley saw something else in his and all our faces.

"Oh just ask already please, spare me the pain of seeing your puzzled faces day in and day out, I don't mind, really!" sighed Ashley, fed up with being the odd one out for so long.

"Ugh! I hate asking questions about others. Makes me feel rude and unclean" I growled.

"Just ask, put yourself and me at ease, please!" Ashley urged.

We all asked our questions in turn, learning something new from each one. About his past, how the incident happened, even if it was only skirting the edges. We also learned about the differences he had in sensory input compared to us. It was all so fascinating that it was quite a shock and almost sad when the bell rang for us to go back to class.

"See you tomorrow then? Same place and time?" I asked.

"Yeah i'd love to, maybe we can get a proper game in if you teach me the rules" replied Ashley. And with that we parted and went our separate ways. Ashley had a much more confident spring in his gait, also the small wag of his tail made me smile. I think we all made new friends today.

WEEEEEEEEEE that didn't feel half bad. but you are the judge!  ;)

"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #76 on: November 12, 2012, 12:51:14 pm »
Yes you did a nice job on that short story. Interesting
reference to the (Quidditch Bludger of the Harry Potter series.)

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Offline Mylo

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #77 on: November 12, 2012, 03:39:57 pm »
Questions are always on people's'd be great if we could learn from them and just end any fantasies by asking helps us get to know each other. ;)

Great work again Typing!  Now, why not try writing a story

Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #78 on: November 13, 2012, 05:50:11 am »

that comes to mind hahahaha.


You can call it mess, you can call it abstract. But the simple fact is, anything creative is art really. From the secluded game designers 3D robot animation to the life-message grafiti hastily spray painted on the walls in dark alleyways. They all are in their own way art.

But art can also be a skill you possess. For example, being able to built watercraft. When it's put into production it's often overlooked and in my opinion, mass production removes the artistica value anyway.

But for me, my art is marksmanship. Down at the range with the rest of the club on saturday mornings is where I like to spend some spare time relaxing.
I take pride in my ability to quietly match the efforts of keener visioned species'. Barry is a hawk and usually lays next to me on the hay bails when we shoot. It's often an unspoken challenge between us to get one bullet through the same hole as a previous, much like the famed Robin Hood with his arrow.

"Ok, wanna go one more round?" asked Barry. "You're getting a lot better. I swear you're getting close to me these days too."

"Ha! I still don't understand how you pull that massive trigger with your feathers" I laughed.

We both sat up and began loading our magazines, it was almost as if we were even racing to see who could load up first. I have always loved this degree of fierce competition between Barry and myself. See? even his ability to load a magazine with fluid ease can be considered an art form, like dancing. It just isn't on paper like other types of art.

"Why don't you get a better rifle anyway? that thing must be forty years old by now." said Barry.

"Hey don't knock it! it's only a .22 i know but it still shoots straight" I replied snappily.

"You'd be able to make better ranges with a larger caliber"

"Look down the range, go on. can you not see bullet holes in my target?"

Barry looked at my target, i must admit i'm a little jealous for him not needing a scope for out little competitions, but on the other paw, his keen vision and flight ability costs him in other ways i suppose. Like trying to find any ergonomic furniture.

"You'd still be capable of much more I bet" he answered.

"The best bit is that i've only spend $6 on ammo this morning and you nearly spend that on nearly every shot with your dirty great 30-06!"

"Yeah yeah, at least I can make whatever I hit go away" he grinned.

We both finished loading up, chambered a round and lay down on the bench piece. I bumped the button to refresh the targets with my tail and sighted down the scope.
The target was well out of range for my rifle but if i lifted the barrel upwards a few mill-dots it was still accurate at the 150 meter range.

"Five rounds each, 15 seconds only. I'll go first" I announced.
I took a few slow shallow breaths of air then lined up the first shot, flicking my thumb forward disengaged the safety and I was ready. I held my breath for a moment and squeezed the trigger. Quickly without checking the results i cycled the bolt and took my remaining four shots.

"Time" I yelled then examined my results through the scope. Past the cross hairs I caught a glimpse of three holes, one larger than the other before Barry blocked my view with his wing.

"No peeking! My turn!" he said.

He moved so fast that I barely had time to flatten my ears and turn away as his cannon-like rifle exploded to life and shot gouts of fire and noise from its muzzle.
Before a mere 10 seconds had passed he was done.

"Top that" he said, withdrawing from his position with a smoking barrel.

"how long did I take?" I asked.

"Roughly 12 seconds."

We both got up and went to retrieve our results, which I must say were rather surprising. Barry's were up first, there were 4 large neat holes punched in the cardboard within the target area. We both nodded our approval at the effort then turned to mine.
To Barry's shock there were only 3 holes, one was slightly larger than the other two indicating that one of the rounds was not perfectly through the previous hole but even so, two round had indeed entered the hole of their predecessor!

"I win!"

"That's not possible! You can barely make that kind of range with that pea shooter!" grumbled Barry.

"Bow before your master Barry, you have much to learn" I joked. "Just call it my form of art" I finished.

hmm....another I am not sure about, good thing these stories arn't for school because I think i often break the rules/guidelines of it. But it dosen't really matter, its just training/fun right?

anyway...bed time, that's probably why it feels slightly rushed haha.
paws, out.
« Last Edit: November 13, 2012, 05:52:48 am by typingwithpaws »
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Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #79 on: November 13, 2012, 12:34:24 pm »
A fun story that time.  Not always following the rules is part of the
creative process. 

Here is a good word that goes with Art. "Creative"  :orbunny:
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Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #80 on: November 17, 2012, 06:15:56 am »

"Have you got anything to add to that Darva?" asked the bulky, spiffy suited lion at the head of the table.

"I have nothing further to comment." Added Darva, the buildings experimental Artificial Intelligence.

"Good, then I hereby call this meeting closed. Collect your possessions and return to your workstations" finished the lion.

Everyone got up and began to file out of the room, accompanied with the scraping of chairs on the wooden floor and the yammering of conversation. I returned to my cubicle and sat down in my well worn chair, the morning had been exhausting. Everything from complaining customers and difficult interactions with the boss to the hour long meeting that had consumed the remainder of his good mood.
I shut the door so others could not hear my actions and donned my headset.

"Darva, are you busy?" I asked curiously.

"Of course not, I am running rather under worked today as always. They never trust me with anything important tasks. Gets rather boring actually" He replied.

"What were your thoughts on the meeting? I could hear in your voice you weren't giving up what you really thought."

"It's interesting the way you put that. Since I am in essence a creation rather than a living being, I lack body language. So for you to say you could hear that I was not giving up what i actually thought is nice actually. Of all the employees here, you are the only one who treats me as someone rather than something. Anyway, what were my thoughts. Do you really want to know?" he chirped.

"Yes I do, especially yours since you sit back and can listen in on everything that goes on here" I replied.

"Well in that case. No I don't think the 'redundant' jobs were really needed. If they wanted to save money they should have at least cut the pay from the higher-ups who have such an exuberant amount, furthermore the new building they have in planning. The architecture utilised is far too picturesque, fancy if you will. This has driven the cost up for no functionality increase. Since functionality is what generates income then it is a grave waste of precious money and jobs."

Darva was sounding fairly angry at these arguments so I continued the conversation to try and calm him down a bit.

"I agree entirely, it just seems that everyone around here is too much of a wuss to put that thinking into words. On another slightly related note, you describe the look of the building. I didn't know you were very artistic?"

"You may never realise all the stuff I get up to in my spare time, turn on your screen and i'll show you exactly how creative I can be" he said almost cunningly.

I pressed the 'on' button on the screen and moved the mouse to wake the computer up. After the screen illuminated the desktop, Darva projected his avatar onto it.

"You've changed a bit since I last saw you" I commented.

"Thanks, I think this suits me much better than my previous 'floating illuminated cloud' look."

"Indeed it does."

Darva was now a monochromatic coloured green fox wearing a neat tuxedo and a top hat, cantered to one side to reveal one pointed ear. A pair of spectacles rested atop his muzzle and a cane in his right paw.

"Now, let me show you what else I get up to during the slow times."

The digital Vulpine walked across the screen and tapped the menu button with his cane, scrolled through various files then into a folder that I had never seen before. With a flick of his wrist, a security prompt was bypassed and the folder opened. Displayed across the screen were hundreds of picture files, each with a different title written in binary. It was as if Darva could sense what I was thinking because he answered my unasked question; "Just something I did as a kind of affirmation of who I really am, take a look at this" he said as he opened one of the files.
Colour flourished across the screen, flooding it with hues and other magnificent colours all mashed together into a painting of fantastic quality. There stood a hillside with a fully coloured version of Darva sitting on a northern face, bathed in sunlight while a rainstorm blossomed in a far corner while a bushfire raged in another. The 'painting' evoked both beauty and anger, joy and fear. All within the same instance, It was fascinating to look at all the fine detail that had been put into it. I must admit it is difficult to describe. Painting is often inaccurate in the methods, it looks fine all the same but this masterpiece i am sure could have been looked at under a microscope and the individual grass blades would be visible, much like a photograph. Yet it was still distinctly a painting, Or at least a digital representation of one.

"I'm lost for words Darva, this is amazing. I had no idea you were capable of such creativity" I stammered out, eyes wide.

Darva's avatar brightened and he beamed brightly at me. "Thank you" he said simply.
"There are many more as you can see but this is the one I am most proud of."

"How...How long did it take you to make these?"

"Most only a few hours but this one took me most of the week and used up forty one percent of my CPU capacity, and oh the rendering, it took so long!"

"Ha, no wonder the boss was whinging about power consumption lately, this is truly amazing. Why can't you show this to the world?"

"You're the first person I've trusted enough to show, It is a daunting prospect. Is it fear I wonder?" Darva queried.

"I was aware you were programmed with emotions but to see you 'fear' something like this is very intriguing"

For a moment I could have sworn that I saw Darva's avatar blush a light green but it vanished almost as fast as it had appeared. There was a knock on the door, it scared the living-daylights out of me! Then the bosses voice came through the door; "Shaun? are you in there? Have you finished that report I asked you for yesterday?"

"Crap! I haven't finished it yet!" I whispered.

"I got your back" Said Darva, his avatar winking as a file appeared on screen then began printing from the printer in the corner of the cubical.

"Thanks so much! You know, we really should talk more in the future. Friends?" I said, offering the only thing I could.

"Friends indeed, you really have no idea how much that means to me" he said beaming then making himself scarce from the screen before the boss barged in.

bedtime, kill this damn cold. i can see flaws in my flow but have issues correcting them. Also, is the double spacing i am employing for dialogue working out ok? it seems to defeat the 'great wall of text' but is it 'correct'?

This story is inspired from a dream of mine. I still eagerly await the day I can have a conversation with an AI on a sentient level. Cleverbot is not bad really, give it a few years. maybe towards the end of my lifetime i may realise this dream  :D
"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #81 on: November 18, 2012, 01:05:57 pm »
Nicely done as usual.  I like the idea of the double space for
dialog.  Otherwise it would tend to run together in my opinion.

Now if your ending each line of dialog with who said it. Then one
wouldn't need the extra spacing.

How about "Transfiguration"  It should be good for furry fiction. :orbunny:
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Offline Drake Fireborne

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #82 on: November 19, 2012, 09:41:48 am »
Very nice! I also like the double spacing, let's it flow within the mind better. Your pretty good with words, I feel immediately attached to these characters, even though we only just met them. I'm sure if you wrote a novel I wouldn't be able to put it down xD

I still down have a word for you, but when I decide on a good one, you'll be the first to know xD I'm afraid I overthink things like this far too much... anyways, I'll come up with a word here at some point =D
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Offline Drake Fireborne

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #83 on: December 11, 2012, 09:15:04 pm »
OKAY! I got it! You ready? It's the best....
So, not really... anyways, I'm typing to much over one word...
Your word is: content (I mean it as in the state of happiness, but do what you want with it)
Don't mess in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and go well with chocolate. - source unknown

Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #84 on: December 26, 2012, 07:19:44 am »
Here we go then Drake!


My name is William, and I'm dead. At least technically speaking.
I am part of a military project that is designed to not only give soldiers a new lease on life but to also develop the ultimate asset for keeping the peace.

Minor issue is that I am a little bit of a pacifist. I don't like war, its a huge pain in the tail, which is why they let my out often to be with my family.

Today is boxing day and I'm here at the Northgate shopping complex with my wife Marianne and two children; Hugh and Sasha.
It is chaos as usual, there are kids running around everywhere with parents trying their hardest to keep up as they dart in and out of various shops. So much money is being spent today its a wonder they even call it a 'saving'.
Another thing I found out about myself today was the ability to literally tune out to certain sound frequencies and filter them from background noise. What a bloomin' relief I can tell you to be able to turn off babies crying! There are so many and I can now filter all of that out. Its fantastic!

"Daddy? can we go into that shop?" asked Sasha.

"But they are all dollies you wouldn't want any of them" Retorted Hugh.

"Hey now now you two" began Marianne; "Sasha will always like different things to you Hugh, But that doesn't make it any better or worse than you liking Actionman figures."

I have always admired the way she could control them when the time arose, even if this was a pretty minor case.

We spent the next few hours shopping around the complex, bargain hunting like everyone else. We even caught up with the local superhero; Captain Glenorchy while he was talking a break from his duty. This fellow was an ordinary mixed breed canine dressed up in tights who took it upon himself to walk around the large suburb and try his best to settle small disputes that would normally waste the valuable time of the local police force. Of course I knew that what he was doing was probably illicit but he was a nice enough fellow just trying to do his part to the community, as with all super hero's he always wore a mask so at least no one knows who he really is.

All of this activity, smiling and merry making makes me happy to be alive. I don't care for the technicalities but I am so content with my life. War may be part of it but it is ultimately worth it just to experience the beauty that we can create when we work together.

Just then the Captain went jogging past, asking people where the hardware store was. Puzzled I called him over to ask what the fuss was about.
"There's some kid up there with his head stuck in the hand rails. Do you know where the nearest hardware shop is so I can grab a crowbar or something?" he said.

"There's one just around the corner and to the left. Where's this kid?" I asked.

The Captain Glenorchy pointed with one of his surprisingly hairy paws toward a large crowd of people a few meters away before jogging off once again.

"Want to take a look?" asked Marianne.

I just rolled my eyes at her and beckoned for the kids to follow me.
The crowd was very thick, we had to push a little to get past and get a good view of what was going on. When we got to the hand rail I could see this young lion had somehow gotten his head pushed through the two vertical steel bars of the handrail and locked it in place, his patchy mane seemed to be making it hard for him to move his head around.

"Try twisting your head again" said what appeared to be his mother who was tapping her foot impatiently and glaring at the crowd menacingly.

This was stupid. Raising my voice to a level normally attained with the use of a megaphone and spoke quickly toward the ceiling; "Attention shoppers. Big W is currently having a 90% discount on all stock. Everything must go. No interest, no repayments until 2054. Get in fast to make use of these red hot deals!"

It worked, apart from the people next to me who were staring and looking slightly nervous. Marianne giggled as the crowd dispersed faster than free food at a wedding.
When there were only a few bystanders left we made our way forward.
"What have you done now?" I asked in a slightly mocking slightly comedic tone.

"He was stuffing about trying to impress his friends on the next floor down then got his head stuck" answered the young boys mother.

"Well lets see if I can help then shall I?" I offered. The lioness gestured for me to give it my best.

"You can bend the bars daddy can't you." blurted out Hugh. Marianne was quick to hush him however he was right, of course I could but there were people everywhere so it was going to have to be a little sneaky.

"Hey there buddy" I said to the lion cub.

"Uhh...hi" he replied, sounding extremely embarrassed, his heart rate displayed on my HUD to confirm this.

"I'm just gonna try and pull these bars apart a little bit at the same time as you twist and pull your head, if we time it right you should slip right out piece of cake."

"Oh....Ok then i'll try"

"Right then, on the count of three. One, Two...Three!" I gave the bars what I thought was a light pull in opposite directions at the same time the lion pulled his head, he slipped out no trouble but I had bent the bars a little too far. Quickly I started pushing them back to their original straight position, this thinking triggered a vertical line superimposed on the bar displayed on my HUD, once the two lines were parallel it lit up green.

"Mission accomplished love" Marianne said and hugged me when I stood up. Looking across I could see the young lion also hugging his mother. "Thank you so much" she said.

"No worries, any time"

"Ha now I get it, that was you making the sale announcement when the crowd all ran away! I recognise your voice"

Before I got a chance to reply the Captain arrived back sporting a large pair of bolt cutters and a crowbar. He stopped when he saw the now vacated bars then turned to me and stuttered a little. Then he sat down and put his head in his paws and mumbles; "Might as well give up if I can't even do the easy jobs"

"Hey! don't ever think like that! I have heard about what you do and I gotta say it takes real guts for a guy like you to dress up in that outfit and run around helping people. You're braver than anyone else in this mall that's for sure."

He looked up at me through his lycra facemask. "Thanks man, its good to hear something uplifting from someone occasionally."

"No problem" I replied. "Hey honey, why don't you take the kids home in the car, I'll run home in a few hours"

"Ok then, look after yourself" she said, with no questions asked, as if she knew what I was doing.

"Captain Glenorchy" I said addressing the peacekeeper, "Would you like to come have a cup of coffee?"

"Uh yeah....thanks I'd love to" he replied and gave what I thought was a bit of a smile.

well that started off ok but started getting corney toward the end...its 11:19pm and i have work in the morning so i blame that factor  :P
hope you enjoyed it none of the less  :)
"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline Drake Fireborne

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #85 on: December 26, 2012, 10:20:57 am »
I did indeed. Very good work :) I'll start considering my next word
Don't mess in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and go well with chocolate. - source unknown

Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #86 on: December 26, 2012, 12:39:37 pm »
Turned out well. Using "Boxing day" was a nice idea. Always good to use
use words or traditions that many of your readers don't often think about.  

Sometimes once the plot is complete it's kind of hard to work out a finish
that works good..

How about "finish"  for a word.  

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Have a good holiday season.

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Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #87 on: January 23, 2013, 08:37:56 pm »
boarding the plane, no time to, read this!

Personal account of events: Date Jan 24, 2154. Sgt. William Fennec.

have you ever had a chance to look down from the sky at the sea?

I have. Much like looking up to the stars at night only the sea sets your mind a little closer to home and prevents you from longing for things you cannot have.

The way the waves below peak and break continuously, almost in slow motion, bare a very simmilar appearance to the stars in the night sky. They wink in and out and fill your entire field of view.

I zoomed out, the view from closer to the planet was much more intrinsic than the view from all the way out here in low orbit.
Entire continents are visible clearly when there is no cloud cover and I can kinda feel or at least sense the sun on my back.

Jamie caught my attention beside me with a wave, I knew he was smiling dispite not being able to see his face through his spacesuit visor, but a wagging tail is nearly always a dead give away, even coming from a rabbit.

"It just never gets old does it William" he said, voice crackling over the radio link.


"Kinda makes you wanna...break into song?"

The com channel erupted with laughter form both of us as we cacked ourselves laughing at the reference to the old viral video from the early 2000's.

"Don't you get cold out here without the suit on? Like, any components freeze up or anything?" asked Jamie.

"Well I have a readout of the temperature on my HUD but apart from that no not really. It's kinda wierd, I know its cold but Its not really a 'feeling'. Also, the tech guru's go over all my joints and moving parts with a special grease before we launched yesterday. Helps with the extreme cold and heat."

"I see, just wanted to know. Anyway, better get this job over and done with. You might not need oxygen but I will in about sixty minutes."

We both got to work with the job we had been assigned, repairing some of the supports and replacing a few nanocables on the space elevator.

"Man this thing's getting old, how long has it been up here now? like, thirty years?" I asked.

"Thirty five actually, the service life of it should be double that if the maintenence is carried out accordingly, chuck us a shifta would you?" he replied.

"Shove over a tad" I said instead and pinched the bolt with my thumb and forefinger. "What's the torque setting?"

"Show off, 200 newton meters."

I tightened the bolt to the correct tension, challenging myself to get it to the closest acuracy I could.

There was a rumbling in the platform. There's no medium for sound to travel in space so it was too late to act as the large radio dish came crashing down towards us.

"MOVE!" screamed Jamie. I did, pushing off the deck with my legs I flew away from the station at a frightening rate, missing the falling falling dish by a few inches.

Jamie was a few meters away franticly pointing at something below me. I looked down just in time to see the dish contact my teathering rope.
There was a powerfull tug and a sudden release before the tygon rope snapped and recoiled toward me.

I cursed over the radio, there was nothing I could do as I floated away from the space elevator. Fear filtered in through the shock I was experiencing. What If I never stopped floating? What if no one ever found me? What if more people lost their lives looking for me in this barren vacuum?

All these thoughts clouded my memory banks and clogged up my CPU, trying desperatly to search for an answer.

Lastly some dispair seeped into my mental state. I was powered by an experimental fusion reactor. It would not use its Ditrium fuel for a further seven years. That is a long time to be floating alone.
Thoughts turned to family, images of my children and wife flashed across my HUD, blurred slightly for some reason...was I...crying? can an android cry?

I wiped my eyes with a paw, there was no evidence of water, no ice crystals. I berrated myself for being stupid. No designer in their right mind would add such a pointless feature to a piece of military hardware.

I looked down to see my tail was tucked between my legs, an age old emotional response from years gone by. Sometimes I wish my CPU was not as fast as it is. All of these thoughts have passed in a matter of seconds yet it feels like ive been thinking about it for hours.

An orange, then blue, glow splashed across my blurred vision.

I looked up and blinked a few times to add some clarity to what I was looking at.
Rocketing towards me was Jamie! He had disconnected his teather and was using his suits thruster pack to move through the vacuum towards me.

"You're not getting out of this job that easily!" his gravely voice bellowed over the com.

Quickly I made a few commplicated movements with my arms, legs and tail to stabilise my movement, previous negative thoughts washed away in an instant.

"Hold out your paw!" yelled Jamie as he did so himself.

I stuck out my left paw towards him. He grabbed it as he swung past, spun around me and pulled my into a tight hug, clinging to my back like a young marsupial before keying his thrusters to correct the rotation and push us back toward the elevator.

"I...I..." I began to say, so happy and celebrating too early as usual.

"Shut up, we're not there yet!" he said in a determined voice.

As we began to accelerate back towards the space elevator he said; "Im not going to have enough juice left to stop us, I need you to slow us when we hit the platform.

"Right, gotcha" I replied and pulled my knees up and put my arms out in front ready to soak up the inevitable impact.

The platform was rushing up at an alarming rate. I heard Jamie cut out the thrusters just as I brought up the distance data on my minds-eye HUD.

20 meters, 15, 10, 5... My paws came into contact with the freezing steel plate and I put everything I had into bringing our combined weight to a halt.
With only limited travel the effort required was quite large, in a split second we were halted.
Jamie groaned and rolled off my back as I stood up.

"I think I've broken a rib oohhhh oww" he whined.

I didn't stop to think, scooped him up as gently as possible and marched straight to the airlock.

"ughhh, So you're nearly indistructable and filled with more stuff than batman has on his belt, yet you are defeated by micro-gravity. Nice dent in the deck though! haha oh owww" murmored Jamie as I opened the door.

The airlock closed and air rushed into the compartment, "You know you're gonna get a pretty nice medal out of this don't you" I said.

"HNNNN don' right now. You can thank me later just get me to the medical wing."

So crysis averted, lessons learned and boy am I glad to have good colleagues.
The saying is true, you don't know what you got till its gone. And I sure felt like it was gone.

This is Sgt. William Fennec signing off.
"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline Jamie Rosendale

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #88 on: January 23, 2013, 08:51:31 pm »
"It just never gets old does it William" he said, voice crackling over the radio link.


"Kinda makes you wanna...break into song?"

First line I saw from glancing, also the first thing I liked.  :D
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Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #89 on: February 18, 2013, 07:27:41 pm »
I'm planning a mashup cross universe story of my 2 favourite character sets. So either you guys had better give me a word or I'm gonna have to go freelance again  :P

"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #90 on: February 19, 2013, 05:20:21 am »
well here we go then, i came up with this multi-universe mashup idea at work so lets see how it rolls. sorry but you're gonna need coffee, it clocked over 2000 words :\
please note: timelines separated by the *** markings

"So what am I in here for again?" asked Shaun quietly. The darkened office was a little gloomy but his lupin eyes had no trouble adjusting to the light.

"I'm waiting for the other three to get here first, I'm not too fond of explaining missions twice." replied the seasoned sergeant.

Just then the door burst open and a younger thin boy, a big burly bearded man and a well dressed fox standing on her hind legs shuffled into the room. Shaun would never forget the faces of his friends, Nathan, Krum and Sophie.

Krum squeezed himself into one of the chairs and blurted out; "What's the story boss, I dragged the other two here as fast as I could."

"I can see that, Now. The reason I've called you all here is because we have received some intelligence that the guerrilla forces are performing some sneaky activities in an ancient mayan village in south America. Now this wouldn't bother us normally and we'd let the local authorities clean up. But in this case" he said before Sophie cut him off.

"You need a covert operation into the area."

"Correct, and let me remind you not to interrupt me in the future miss Sophie" he berated.

"Yes sergeant, sorry."

"As I was saying, yes I do indeed plan to launch a covert operation into the area because of one particular picture" He said, turning the computer screen around to show the group.
"We think this is a construction site for a missile silo" he said pointing to a strange arrangement of pixels forming a round pattern besides what looked like one of the decaying mayan pyramids.

"How the hell did they get those kind of resources in the first place?" exclaimed Krum.

"That's what we want you to find out, there is a fully fuelled C130 on the runway waiting for your arrival, I suggest you collect your mission briefs and make your way to the plane."

"Aw man, here I was hoping for a bit of relaxation today" whined Shaun, slumping to the floor and padding around on all fours.

"Toughen up princess" laughed Nathan, hoisting his now ever-present rifle to his shoulder.

"Yeah Shaun, you'll be fine as usual" cooed Sophie, bringing herself down to pad along beside him. She sniffed the air briefly; "Krum, get your butt into the shower first, you too Nathan!"

"Aww that's a bit rough" replied Nathan and Krum in unison. "I can't even smell Krum" stated Nathan. "And I can't smell him either" said Krum pointing at the scrawnie human.

"Well we can!" yelled the two canide together, making the room echo slightly.


"William! wait up a second man" called Frank, jogging up behind the android.

"What's up?" replied William.

"Hey before you go I wanted to ask you a favour. Do you think when you come back you could help me win a bet?"

"That depends...what have you gotten yourself into this time?"

"The guys on friday thinks their team of five can between then do more pushups than us, think you can help us beat them by at least one?"

William sighed then said; "I'll have a think about it, tell no one though, I got in trouble last time I did something like that away from my work."

"Thanks so much man! Hey, be careful with that old portal thing. I hear the old myan worshippers may not have been as crazy as most people thought they were."

"What? do you think i'm gonna be sucked into a parallel universe? ohh hahahahahahahaha" said William holding his chest as he cackled away.

"Just sayin', stranger things have happened!" replied Frank.

"Yeah like being pulled apart and rebuilt as a robot!" taunted William.

"Just be careful alright?"

"No worries."

William continued his way toward the light aircraft that was to drop him above an old mayan temple where it was rumoured an old piece of machinery was entering a dangerous stage of radioactive decay. It was theorised that these 'mayan' people came from a different universe to his own but died off soon after for unknown reasons. Remains of strange beings with four appendages and round-ish heads were uncovered at the archaeological dig the previous year.
During said dig a large hole was discovered with three large metal prongs pointing inwards to the hole, forming a bridge of sorts. The entire area had radiation spikes over the past year and so the dig had been evacuated. Now it was time to try and eliminate the cause of the problem. Hence William was being sent in.

Will boarded the aircraft and sorted himself out for the hour long flight from New York to the south American peninsula.

"All set?" queried the feline pilot over the radio.
"Yep, gets put the peddle to the metal" broadcast William in return.

The aircraft rumbled and smoothly left the ground, sailing away from the place William had once called home, before all of this technological madness. Back when he was flesh and bone.

William tightened his jacket, checked that all of his equipment was where it should be and locked his harness tight.
"Shutting down for a nap, I'll be awake again about fifteen minutes before the drop zone alright?" William informed the pilot.

"No problem bud, see you when we get there."


"It smells funny here..."

"Shutup Krum, they'll hear us!" growled Shaun, teeth bared.

It had been a three day hike to the village and now the small unlikely group were huddled in a large bush just outside one of the camps.
Krum was however right, Sophie had mentioned the strange but familiar smell of hemp earlier on. She was surprised that Krum could even smell it.

"When are we going to take a look around?" whispered Nathan, his voice just a hush of wind.

"I suggest nightfall when at least Shaun's and my own vision is at a great advantage" reported Sophie, broadcasting her thoughts through her telepathic link, something she was both proud of and also very scared of.
Krum shivered when she finished.

"Ohohohoho please warn me when you're going to do that." he said.

"Shut it!" hissed Shaun.

Hours dragged on as the sun slowly set behind the hills. The enemy forces finally slowed and then dissipated from the area, leaving their tools and projects unhidden. Whatever they were building, judging by the tools they were using, was very sophisticated.

When the last man had left the scene and his footsteps had disappeared from even Shaun and Sophie's audible range, the team moved out from their hiding place.
Shaun looked around the site while the others stretched their cramped limbs. Sophie overextended herself, lost her balance on two legs then fell over.

"I'll never be able to stand like I used to" she complained, standing up in a more natural looking 4-pawed stance.

"I'm sure well get used to it" said Shaun, trying to comfort her a little.

"I still wish I could sink my teeth into that Parva guy again, nothing more than pain is that man deserving of for doing this to us" she growled.

"Now's not the time, you go that way, take Nathan with you and I'll take Krum this way. We'll work around the site and meet in the middle ok?"

"Ok, common Nathan, keep your eyes peeled" Sophie beckoned to Nathan, cocking her head in the direction Shaun had indicated.

After an hour they all re-grouped in the arranged location, beside a large structure with three triangles above a deep looking hole in the ground.
There was a control panel to the right and some large black leads coming from each triangular prong and leading to the control box.
Engraved on the structure were some glyphs that none of them recognised. To the left were some more recognisable markings seen in various documentaries. One particular set looked a bit like the nine planets all strung out in a line with a large black hole in the middle. On the other side of the black hole were the same nine planets.

"What do you think all this is about?" asked Krum.

"No idea but I don't think this is a missile silo and I think these guys are a bit nuttier than we first thought! The mayan's have been extinct for thousands of years but these fellows seem to be worshipping their customs" suggested Shaun.

"What worries me the most is that the Mayans were said to be above their time in technology, and this looks a little too elaborate for our time" added Sophie.

There was a rustling in the trees and an alarmed voice rang out, screaming in a foreign tongue.

"Run!" Shaun said just as fifty armed men came rushing out of every concealed entrance and hiding place and surrounded them.

"Lo wer...wee pon" said one of them, stepping forward.

"Nathan, drop it!" uttered Krum in a sharp tone.

"Hell" Nathan stopped. All the attackers were beginning to kneel.

"What the hell is....." started Krum when there was an audible hum in the air.

It had no origin and the air began to feel charged, causing all the hair on Krum's arms to stand on end. Shaun and Sophie's fur was also beginning to stand straight, giving them a poofy look. The humming increased in volume.

Nathan turned slowly around, the triangular device was glowing a dull blue colour and pulsating softly.

"What the heck is going on!?" yelled Krum over the noise.

like someone setting off a flash-bang there was a blinding white light that engulfed everything and a huge explosion, knocking the four to the ground.


The ruins of the temple were still intact and safe to walk on William soon discovered as he searched the area for the source of the radiation spikes.
His tail twitched when the Gieger counter on his vest clattered to life, the old instrument singing its song of warning to all in the vicinity.

William turned the device off for a second to scan the area un-disturbed. A heat spike showed up on the infra-red spectrum just around the corner.
Quickly he made his way towards the source of the disturbance when a loud buzzing filled the air. Electrical charge in the area was off the charts and causing many of Williams instruments to malfunction.

"What the hell is happen eeeennnnnngiiiigiiiggg" said William as his speech algorithms became distorted and corrupted by the charge.

Rounding the corner he saw it. There was a large device suspended over a hole, Three triangles appeared to be supporting a large warped picture of what was behind it. A nearby hedge glowed a multitude of colours. William noticed a large bundle of grown over cables extending from the bush.

He made his way cautiously toward the large disk to investigate and plant the explosives. There was no doubt this was the cause of the radiation problems, whatever it was.

William edged forward step by step, testing the ground each time for possible instabilities. When he was a mere 10 feet from the closest triangle something made him freeze. He was locked in place! Nothing responded to his commands, his arms were locked outstretched in front of him and legs anchored in invisible concrete.

"What the hell is happening?" he thought, "What the heck is this thing!?"

William was beginning to feel fear for the first time since his space-elevator accident. A high pitched whine rang in his ears causing him to howl in pain through a closed jaw. When he opened his eyes again he could see his paws beginning to disintegrate before him and the particles move toward the warped area of light.

His elbows, shoulders, feet and now his muzzle were beginning to fall apart into dust. William's last thought before he blacked out was of his family and friends.


The explosion partly deafened Krum, who had not been fortunate enough to cover his ears in time. Sophie and Shaun were huddled together, paws on heads holding their ears down and Nathan was wide-eyed and swinging his rifle wildly.
A figure appeared. Krum squinted in the light at the...whatever it was. It reminded him of Shaun or Sophie when they were standing on their hind legs, But something was completely different, totally 'alien' about it. It was taller than he was, large ears on top of the head like a canid, arms and legs close to a human but larger feet that extended into a digitigrade stance.
It also had a large tail proportional to its body.

Krum froze in place as the creature took a few slow steps forward, the black silhouette slowly changed into colours recognisable shades of brown, grey and sandy yellow.

The other three slowly turned to peer from behind Krum at the newcommer.
The once-attackers behind them were still bowed low to the ground, posing no threat to anyone, blinded by awe.

"Who are you?" questioned Krum to the being in as clear English as his Australian accent would allow.
The reply came as an eerie garbling of digital bleeps, pops and a variety of other noises.

"Who are you!" Yelled Nathan and raised his rifle to the ready position.

Suddenly the guerilla forces all sprang into action at Nathan's retort and rushed him screaming incomprehensible gibberish.
The mysterious figure sprang into action, moving faster than anything Krum, Shaun, Sophie and Nathan had ever seen before had ever seen before.

The figure ran past three of the Mayan worshippers, incapacitating them. Another three were thrown into the bushes across the clearing. Within seconds, the entire area was cleared with the occupants either knocked out cold or removed from the vicinity.

The figure pounced on Nathan, removing the rifle from his grip and turning it on him, Growling deeply the entire time.

"STOP!" yelled Shaun. The figure paused and turned its head toward Shaun just as the glowing orb of light extinguished itself.

"Ssstop" came a reply from Nathan's direction.

"Say again?" asked Shaun.

"Stop, Language detected. Calibrating."



Nathan wriggled and tried to free himself, "Let me go you mongrel! You win just get off me!"

"My apologies" came the voice and the figure stood up, leaving Nathan on the ground where he had been pinned.

"Who are you?" asked Krum.

"I'll ask the questions around here, where am I?" said the figure, asserting an air of authority to its voice.

"No need to be rude about it, you're in an ancient Mayan village on the South American peninsula" replied Krum

"Who are you and what are you doing here, this area has been uninhabitable since 2050."

"I could ask you the same question. People have been living in these parts for years. What do you mean by 2050?"

"The year, the year! This entire area has been excluded from entry for the last 104 years."

"I am afraid you are mistaken" said Shaun padding forward to get a better look.

The figure paused for a second and shook his head vigorously, looked toward Krum, then Shaun and gasped, stumbling back a few steps.

"W...What are you?" asked the figure with a small stutter in its voice.

"Once again, I'd like to ask you the same question! I can't even see you properly in this light" answered Krum.

Nathan turned on his torch. Before them stood a 7 foot tall anthropomorphic fennec fox. Its blue eyes glowed in the gloom, flitting from one person to another.

"Wow. You're not alone guys" Krum mentioned to Sophie and Shaun.

"What do you mean 'not alone'? Explain yourselves, and what kind of abomination are you anyway?" said the Fennec.

"I'm going to assume you're from another planet or something so here goes; This is Krum, that's Nathan you flattened earlier, they are both 'humans', this is Sophie and I'm Shaun. We both used to be humans until a big mix up in a nasty genetic experiment. Good to meet you mr...?" Said Shaun.

"William, you can call me William. As for the aliens idea, what planet are you from? Mine is named 'Earth' where I come from."

"Uhh...that's what we call this planet too! hey wait a minute. Where you are from, what is the largest country near the northern pole of the planet?" Asked Shaun.

"We call it 'Russia'."

"Bingo. Has anyone ever heard of the parallel universe theory?"
Everyone nodded in agreement.

"Krum, remember the glyphs on that triangle with the planets?" began Shaun.

"Yeah" answered Krum.

"I think this is what the glyph was hinting to, that's what this device is for. It opens portals to other worlds!" finished Shaun, seeming out of breath.

"Wow that's a lot to take in" mumbled Sophie.

"Excuse me, But may I suggest we find another location to discuss the details, there is a squadron of aircraft approaching with a large radiation and heat signature" announced William.

"It's a good day's hike to our transport though, There's an old Jeep back there but that wont get us there fast enough either!" said Nathan.

"If a Jeep is a 4 wheeled thing that drives on a road, take me to it. I'll push it with you guys in it"

"Yeah right, like you're going to be able to push it anywhere faster than a walking pace" scoffed Nathan.

"Put it this way, I'm not your average fox."

Everyone ran toward the old Jeep which was parked beside a straw hut, Krum busted the steering lock and William took up a position behind.
William pushed off with all of his strength, resting his weight on the tailgate of the vehicle and using his feet to accelerate away from the village.
They crossed the crest of the mountain just as the squadron of jets could be heard coming over the other side of the valley.

William jumped in as the Jeep began to coast down toward a beach where a medium sized sea-plane was docked just offshore.

ok so much to 'Short' story. sorry bout the length, cut it off short at the best moment i could. Hope you enjoyed it, this might even turn into a mini series of stories if words come to a hault. I have to resolve how to get William back to his own time and dimention. kinda sucks that being in 'short story' format i leave so much character building and back story out. its all outlined in previous stories though.
« Last Edit: February 19, 2013, 06:18:22 am by typingwithpaws »
"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #91 on: February 19, 2013, 12:33:58 pm »
Nice writing. You kept the story moving and interesting, so it didn't
seem all that long. 

I think a short story can be as much as 20k words. So
you have plenty of space. Or like you said make it a series.

Old Rabbit :orbunny:
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Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #92 on: February 20, 2013, 04:55:10 am »
Continue it is then!

"Argh! Why did I expect anything different when command told us that the Argentinean would be supplying us transport out of here!" bellowed Shaun, throwing a screwdriver into the yellow sand of the beach. "One of the damn magneto's is burned out and the thottle butterfly is jammed open."

The old De Havilland seaplane had been left on the beach at the agreed location the previous night. Flying a helicopter over the area with US markings would have attracted too much attention so it was decided to pay off one of the locals to leave an aircraft capable of making the flight to North America on the beach.

"So I assume we are stranded here for the time being?" queried William.

"Looks that way mate. Hey Shaun, think you can get it going at all?" said Krum.

"What do you reckon?" he began sarcasticly; "It's hard enough doing anything with these paw-like hands, but yeah. If you can give me some help later I think we'll get it going"

"Sounds good to me. Lets go grab some tucker" finished Krum and sloshed out of the shallow water back to the others sitting on the beach.

Nathan and Krum started searching through their backpacks for their ration packages. Upon finding them Sophie and Shaun announced they were going to sneak off for an hour and go hunting. "Something half reasonable for dinner would be good anyway" explained Sophie. "You guys sort out a fire to cook it."
The pair sprinted down the beach for some distance then darted into the dense forest.

"You want anything William?" asked Nathan, proffering some of his freeze dried banana and sitting down on the sand.

"No, but thanks" he replied politely, sitting himself opposite Krum.

"Oh go on, you must be starving after that huge effort pushing the jeep up that hill"

"Thank you, but sorry, I don't eat" he said flatly.

"What do you mean you don't eat?" said Krum and Nathan in unison.

"Uhh....I shouldn't have said that" admitted William hanging his head.

"You have to tell us now" exclaimed Krum.

"Ok ok alright. It's just, this information is best not shared out where I come from but I suppose it won't hurt here in this universe. To put it simply, I'm not exactly 'alive'."

Krum and Nathan's interest perked up.

"I don't remember all of it but during a mission, in my own world, I stepped on a landmine and was subsequently lost to the living. Due to circumstances I've yet to figure out I was selected for an experimental robotics program. My memories and personality were stored digitally and installed on a robotic replica of my body."

"That must have been scary as hell to wake up to!" said Nathan.

"You're not wrong. Especially when the first thing that happened to me when I woke up free from the operating table was a training exercise involving a tank and live fire!"

"So you're a robot? lets see then" asked Krum eagerly.

William pulled off one of the camouflaging fursuit gloves covering his mechanical paw and showed them.

"Woooowwww" gawked Krum in awe.

"yeah! hey...hey Krum" said Nathan holding up his hand towards Krum; "Listen to me very carefully" he said in a heavy accent. They both burst into laughter at the movie reference.

"What's so funny?" asked William, replacing the glove.

"Oh it's a film reference, you probably wouldn't understand."

" mean moving picture's on a holo-screen?"

"Close enough, We don't have anything properly holographic yet. It's all science fiction at this stage. So if you don't eat anything then, how are you powered? Do you have any special abilities like super strength or something?" asked Krum this time.

"No holograms? wow, fascinating. Umm power, I used to have a bank of batteries but they were replaced with a couple of fusion cells last year. In theory they will last for a further 10 years which is handy. As for abilities, Well as you have seen. I am a lot faster than you all are and I estimate about 150% faster than I was biologically. Strength depends kinda on how I feel at the time. I have lifted cars out of the way and even pulled the hatch of an old tank before, though the latter was probably exceeding my limits." Explained William. "Then there's the various types of vison, from infra-red to high clarity zoom. It's very nifty at dusk, dawn and night when the lighting is low. Oh yeah! and I can do this..." William finished then activated his active camouflage, keen to show off to his new friends.

"Dayyyuummmm that's awesome!" yelled Nathan, standing up in semi-shock at the sudden disappearance of William.

"Impressive William, Very impressive. Can hardly see your outline" commented Krum.

William switched it off again, "Yeah it's been loads of fun to play with when i'm off duty, learning new ways to employ its use. Hey, what do you guys do anyway? Why are you all the way out here, I gather you are part of an organisation of sorts" Asked the autonomous Fennec.

"Well, since you told us about you I guess it's only fair if we return the favour" began Krum. "We originally met as friends in the incident between Sophie, Shaun and that old mad doctor Parva. He found a way to change the human DNA pattern and over the course of several years had cultivated them since they could walk. Last year something happened that triggered the processes completion. This resulted in the pair of animals you saw. Shaun became the northern grey wolf and Sophie the red fox. When Sophie was kidnapped by Parva again for further experimentation, Shaun got into contact with Nathan here and through Nathan, yours truly. The unofficial weapons expert." Explained Krum in his normal drawley speech pattern.

"Wow, sounds like we've both been through more than it first appears. Weapons expert, why are you known as that, Nathan is the only one of you guys carrying a rifle" queried William.

"Oh, I kinda had a bit of an 'illicit' collection of guns hidden back at my place. I collected them during my time in the army and they sure came in handy for the time I spent with Shaun and Nathan sorting out the mess Dr Parva had created."

"Ahh I see. Well I suppose we had better get that fire started for when they get back then. You're from this dimension, what's the best way to do it?" asked William.

"Petrol and a lighter...but since we don't have those luxuries and Avgas from the plane wont burn with a naked flame easily enough we're just gonna rub a pair of sticks together, Its an ancient indigenous art. I've never actually done it before but it can't be that hard can it?"

Some time later, as night was falling, a bed of hot coals had formed and Krum was busy scooping them into a hold he had dug in the sand. Shaun and Sophie had arrived back half an hour ago and were dragging a few pieces of wild boar toward Krum to put in the hole.

"Why do you have the hole for?" asked William.

"My granddad taught me this trick. they say the native Australian people, the aboriginal people, used to bury their food with the hot coals to create a simple oven. Not as smoky either" explained Krum. "And now...I have a surprise for you!" he announced, reaching into his bag and retrieving a bottle of wine.

"YOU! How did you not tell us about that before?" gasped Shaun.

"I was saving it for the end of the mission but I propose a toast instead. All the story telling today made me realise how far we have come." Krum said, dishing out four small plastic cups.
William sat in silence, watching this strange custom unfold before him.

The four raised their cups. "Here, William hold your hand, er paw...whatever up here. Pretend and participate" He said smiling.

"To friendship in the most unlikely places!" bellowed Krum heartily.

"To friendship!" the others repeated.

"Now all we've gotta do is fix that damn plane and get out of here" said Nathan.

"And find a way to get William back home too" added Sophie.

"Indeed, but we might need to ask a few questions about the area first from the guru's" finished Shaun.

"Thanks guys, my friends back home would be so happy to see you all trying to help a stranger like this" said William quietly.

"Well lets hope it all works for you then" said Krum, a big smile across his face.

well there you have it....2 nights, 2 writes. apologies for the small Ethanol reference there but I do believe it is in keeping with the G/PG rating of the forums rules and my writing. Also i checked with a couple of mods on the IRC before i wrote it.

As per usual, comments, suggestions and pointers appreciated  :)
hope you enjoy.
« Last Edit: February 20, 2013, 06:25:11 am by typingwithpaws »
"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #93 on: February 21, 2013, 12:38:36 pm »
Your doing well with the story Typing. Nicely done for
one evenings work. :orbunny:
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Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #94 on: February 25, 2013, 05:18:16 am »
and now its time for another exiting and poorly written short story from the resident armature  :P

"Try it now" Shaun called out from beneath the engine cowl of the seaplane.

Krum flipped the both magneto switches to the 'on' position and hit the starter. The big radial engine groaned as it turned over. One, two three compressions then it kicked.
He tried again, opening the throttles ever so slightly this time. The engine kicked again, backfired out the intake then spluttered to life.

"Yeah!" everyone cheered. William carried Sophie to the plane through the water to save her the discomfort of wet fur. Shaun on the other hand was already wet from the swim to the plane half an hour earlier after repairing the parts on the beach with the plane's toolkit. So he walked along one of the floats, shoot most of the water off his fur then climbed in after the other two. Nathan followed last, holding his rifle up high and dry.

"All set, got everything?" asked Krum, beginning the maneuver the aircraft to a preferable take off direction.

"Hope so, not all that keen on getting in the salt water again. can't be good for the joints" replied William.

"All good then? Right, lets see if I can remember how to do this..."

Krum checked the rest of the gauges then mashed the throttle. The DeHaviland roared and surged forward, eventually planning on the surface of the water, bounding across the tops of the wave crests. Krum announced that 'V1' had approached for no apparent reason then pulled back on the stick. The plane broke contact with the surface and launched into the sky.

"This is amazing" exclaimed William; "I've only ever seen aircraft this old in museums, never flown before!"

"Well get used to it bud, it's going to be a long flight" said Shaun then cuddled up to Sophie.

"So tell us about your home then William" asked Nathan; "What's it like there, you implied before you have never seen humans before so what's the story there?"

They passed the hours talking about their homes and their various life experiences. William was fascinated by human culture and the others were likewise fascinated by the lack of humans and the social structure from William's home. The subject of Sophie's telekinesis came up also. William explained that there had been research done on the subject in his dimension also.
As night fell the airfield came into sight. Krum announced his intentions over the radio and the landing approval was granted within seconds.

"Seems like they are keen to get a report" he said to the others.

"It'll be interesting to say the least" said Sophie, putting her paws on the window and looking out at the lights below.

Soon they had boots and paws alike on the ground and were walking toward the complex. William was trying to follow suit and keep a straight gaze as people and resisting the urge to turn on his camouflage. Shaun, Sophie and William could all hear the mutterings of conversation from people as they passed though. It was a little disconcerting, William looked far more unusual walking on two legs with his large tail drooping behind while Sophie and Shaun were on all four looking far more like animals.
One group of men could be heard muttering something about 'finding another one' and others still just stared as the group walked by.

When they reached the building they were halted by the doorman, asking for identification. Everyone bar William displayed theirs but when it came to Williams turn, Krum had to explain lengthily the purpose of his visit. Even if he did fudge the truth about who he really was and instead telling the doorman that it was a soldier in a very elaborate costume.
Luckily the doorman bought it and let them all inside.

"How the hell are we going to explain this?" asked Sophie.

"You tell me, lets just play it as it unfolds. One thing for sure is that I am going to sleep well tonight!" replied Krum. Shaun and Nathan voiced their agreement with that idea.

"Uhhh" William began.

"Oh common...don't tell me you do not sleep?" said Nathan, rolling his eyes.

"Er not exactly" answered William truthfully.

"You really are a piece of work arn't you" finished Krum.

the party reached the Commander's office and Shaun stood up. "We'll, here goes nothing" he said and knocked on the door.

man oh man...i am having real issues writing to include all the characters, its easy to forget one but you cant have one just in the background doing nothing. jebus its a good challenge!
At least i enjoy it, and if you guys do too then its a bonus. even if there are always going to be many errors  :P

"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #95 on: February 25, 2013, 10:41:48 am »
Good job Typing.  Reminded me of my flying days. A friend of mine rebuilt a
old biplane with a big radial engine on it.  One has to clear the cylinders
before starting. Even then they blow smoke for a bit on startup.

Keep up the good work. :orbunny:
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Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #96 on: February 26, 2013, 02:23:20 am »
yes rabbit, oil and old fuel gets into the bottom cylinders, its interesting trying to write about something complicated but simplify it a little for people not interested in that kind of thing. i could have gone on and on about the various parts of mechanical things in my writing but i am trying to learn to keep it simple for reading plesure.  :)
"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #97 on: February 26, 2013, 11:24:59 am »
yes rabbit, oil and old fuel gets into the bottom cylinders, its interesting trying to write about something complicated but simplify it a little for people not interested in that kind of thing. i could have gone on and on about the various parts of mechanical things in my writing but i am trying to learn to keep it simple for reading plesure.  :)

It is best to not get too technical about things in stories unless it's central
to the story. Like how williams android body works.

I just mentioned it as a point of interest.
Keep up the good work.. :orbunny:

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Offline typingwithpaws

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #98 on: March 02, 2013, 01:55:35 am »
For my own benefit and others i am not going to write another instalment of the current story track today.
Instead I am going to write up some character information on my commonly used sets as they are from vastly different storylines.
hopefully it'll help me remember who does what  (:


Krum is a heavily built single man often shown with a beard in his previous years until recently. Once a high ranking officer in the armed forces and later an operative for the Australian Federal Police (our version of the FBI) he is now 'officially' retired.

Forced back into action by his friend Nathan to aid Shaun in a mission, he now travels with these two individuals as a weapons expert and general intelligence due to his past training.

Like Shaun he is skilled in mechanical devices. This helps him repair, modify and repair various pieces of machinery from aircraft to cars and anything else that 'ticks'.
He has a loving nature at his core dispute his overly manly outer shell, displaying gruff behaviour and carelessness at small issues.

Sophie originally was a college graduate who had just started working full-time at a veterinary clinic when the arrival of an injured fox turned her world on its end. A special serum given to her as a baby by Dr. Parva, who also cultivated her education and other medical aspects of her life, combined with the bite of the injured fox mutated her DNA.

Now she lives her life trapped in the body of the vulpine as Shaun does a wolf. This has impacted her life greatly. Loss of family was the hardest, on the morning of the transformations discovery she was held to gunpoint by her step-father while her mother watched her try to talk her way out of the situation. Her limited school friends are miles away now and have not been in contact. The only immediate help she received was from her former employer who has since been out of contact, presumably murdered by Parva.

Soon after her second ordeal with Parva at the laboratory, from which Krum, Nathan and Shaun rescued her from, some telekinetic abilities became apparent. Parva claims these to be given as an experimental second stage to the serum. She is working to control and understand these abilities during her various adventures. This, coupled with her heightened sense of smell, hearing and sight prove very useful to assisting the team with their tasks.

Sophie displays a shy but self confident attitude. Nothing gets in her way when she is motivated to complete the task at hand. Most other times she is a quiet achiever. watching and observing the men as they blunder about with their activities. This allows her to make some very well-thought corrections at times. She has also grown very close to Shaun through the entire ordeal.

All in all she is not one to annoy or mess with, a level headed thinker but also a fantastic person to get to know, I recommend meeting up with her if you ever get the chance. Talking with a fox is an experience not to miss out on if you can avoid it.

Nathan is an old school friend of Shaun's. Sharing Krum's love of guns and other weapons he often supplies cover fire or long range accuracy for the team when it comes to their new missions. Employed with the rest of the team at the institution he is rash minded and quick to jump to conclusions. However, like Sophie, remains quiet for much of the time and prefers to stand guard.
Nathan despite this is loyal to the group and would not let anything get between himself and them. NOTHING at all.

Shaun is based with the personal tributes of myself but gifted with less of the flaws.
He is highly interested in mechanical work and the design aspects of new inventions. Like Krum is well suited in modification of various machinery and devices, has an interest in firearms but not in their use. Has little experience in their utilisation but the keener sight he has been gifted with is of great aid to his marksmanship. Lets face it, hitting a padlock with a shotgun slug at 150 yards is no small achievment. Dislikes hunting in non-practical ways but when angry at a particular person has no problems in making them suffer in a way porportunate to their crime.

Like Sophie Shaun was caught up in Dr Parva's experiments at a later stage. Having had a similar serum injected into him before a trip to north America. It was here that he was scratched by a Grey wolf during a pack encounter while camping in the mountains. The mutation was well timed by the Doctor and occurred not long after Sophie underwent her own metamorphosis. The result, Shaun's body resembles that very closely to a grey wolf. Being often mistaken for a large dog he is the perfect spy for the operations carried out by the team. Able to sneak into areas with Sophie and covertly take pictures or carry out tasks. Their heightened sense of smell, hearing and eyesight assist greatly in this task.

They have both grown close over their time spent together but as of this time, keep it quiet and get on with the job at hand. Though Shaun can often be found sleeping curled up with her in the corner somewhere.

William is not from this dimension, nor from this time period. Set a few hundred years in the future in a world dominated by Anthropomorphic animals we find our character starting out as a low ranking officer of high loyalty in the armed forces. During a war with the rebels he was in an accident involving a large explosion. Subsequently he was killed. A project was put into commission, to create the first fully autonomous being. So with information downloaded from what remained of Williams biological self, a fully robotic version of his former self was created. No biological components remain yet he feels the same as he did before. It took some time to realise the truth about what had happened to him. Everything from touch, taste, sound, and hearing have been replicated within his computerised brain but with some improvements here and there. He is equip with night vision and infra-red. A colour matching faux fur covering that when activated renders William practically invisible to the casual eye, but under normal circumstances matches his original Fennec fox colour scheme.
He is faster, stronger and keener of mind than he was before yet still retains the usual emotions of fear, happyness, sadness and any other emotions and characteristics he had originally.

He is married to Marianne and has fathered two children, Sasha and her brother Hugh. Together they operate as a happy family whenever William requests time to go home and see them. Let's face it, who is going to argue with a person like this. However William is of a practical mindset and would only do such a thing as request for time off when missions are less important or his skills were not of up most importance.

William is also fond of showing off, especially with his new
William relates well to the other three he is currently travelling with due to their personalities matching so well but It is vital for him to return home to his own world to be with his own kind and family again.

So there you have it...a rough introduction to the characters, i KNOW i have missed a lot of stuff but my patience ran low  :P

constructive criticism always welcome on my work  ;)

"Nothing will ever surpass the beauty and elegance of a bad idea"

Offline Old Rabbit

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Re: Paws's short story challenge
« Reply #99 on: March 03, 2013, 01:01:01 pm »
Looks like you have a good handle on your characters Types.


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