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DenFur2023 - should I stay or should I go?

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Firelight:
Very much yes!

Jade Sinapu:
I booked a room for myself for DenFur 2023. I think it will be my last con.

I wish I had a convention buddy this final time.  But I suspect no.

Jade Sinapu:
So I went to denfur 2023.
It had its good times.  The logistics and cost were crummy.
I had no buddy.  I was lonely at times. I tried to make others happy.  The rave were excellent again.  The punk rock band Fleabags were superb! Highly recommended.  I'm trying to learn more about them.

Some loved me and that made it worth it. Some girls... underage... just adored me so that was fun but of course a little awkward with the almost literal puppy live syndrome happening.  I am glad parents were there.  In other news,  I think I converted a normie.  That was fun.  There was a mime pulling shenanigans.  I thought I was hallucinating when I looked out my hotel window and there was a mime trapped in the box in the window.  At 2am...

I made a few friends.  I attracted some guys,  but I didn't mean to.  I tried explaining myself,  and i think it was ok. They are good doggos. One a gsd like me! Milo. He and I talked.  He's good.  I am grateful for meeting him. 
I met Draco,  a dragon.  She is made by Beastcub just like me!!!
This was the highlight of my furry life so far! I finally met another by my maker.  She was very beautiful and detailed! So realistic! I am wondering if I'm attracted to dragons now.  It's odd to explain the beauty of those intricate scales.

I wish I had a furry girl there as a companion.  No sex required. Just sometime to walk with, someone to talk with and go out to eat with.  Although I'm asexual I do like female companionship at times and am capable of love and affection.  I very often can't see the subtle ways people have been trained  by society to communicate  such feelings,  therefore i miss out.   Also i sometimes don't know what to do when confronted with advances. I'm not afraid.  I just get.... lost some times.  It's hard to explain.

I so wanted just to hold her close,  run my fingers through her fur, look into her eyes and tell her how beautiful she is.  And hold her close.  Feel her breathe,  her warmth. Her heart beating. But that was my furry fantasy talking... she was never there.  God help me. So close but so very far away.  I hate being teased like that.  My fantasies get the better of me at times.

But there are no girls of my type in furry,  or at least I can't find them. I'm now too old. So I give up.
But part of me will always be a furry.
This was my last con. Or close to it. 

I love you all.  Furry has brought me some help,  happiness,  closure,  and opened a few doors too.  I will never forget all that happened in these years.
Its been fun,  but it's been hard too .

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