Dr. Phil said WHAT?!

[Far_Raptor]

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You are describing the antics of another pop-psychologist named "Dr Laura" aka Laura Schlesinger, who also goes by "Dr" but also has no Doctorate in anything remotely having to do with people.

Is that really true?  That quack has no M.D.?  I honestly had no idea.  

That's good to hear.  Now I can feel guilt free for positively hating Dr. Laura.  

Not that everything she says is bad.  She's just...chafes me the wrong way.

[Ecco]

'Dr.' Phil is the biggest load of you-know-what out there! He is not a real shrink, and...have you listened to some of his 'advice'?! Sometimes I get the feeling he has no clue what he's saying, he just lets his gums flap in the wind!  '>

[Drake Blackpaw]

Hmmm...  First off, I'd say my opinion of Dr. Phil is lower than dirt on an ocean floor.  He is not a qualified psychologist and his 30 seconds of "common sense" advice could be harmful to someone who is not able to handle it.

As to the questions:
If it doesn't interfere with living a productive life and interacting with other people, i.e relationships, then there is nothing wrong with it.  

I'm sure calling Jeff's behavior infantile when over well with Dr. Phil's audience.  Saying things like that gets him ratings and sells books.  Is Jeff's behavior "normal"?  Probably not.  Jeff may have some issues that cause him to turn to his Care Bear collection.  However, a 30 second conversation is not long enough to really know much about the situation.

As for a time to grow up and act your age, why? and what does acting your age mean anyway?  If you are a productive member of society then what does it matter?  It's your life, your not living it to be judged if you are acting socially correct by others.

[Shabbernigdo]

I think the reason why Dr. Phil is so popular is because he tells things the way they are. He's not afraid to get to the point and say what's on his mind. He's not "soft spoken" like Oprah or other pychologists. He's very blunt about what a person's problem(s) are and how they should be corrected.
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Hell if thats all it takes just call me Dr Shabbernigdo.

[ClockworkHare]

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1. Is it wrong to have so many stuffed animals?

IMO, no. People of all ages collect many things over time and it's rarely a crime. For example, a guy collects stuffed bears....and? Unless he's committing random lude acts in public with them, I hardly see any offense. Personally I'd be more concerned about those who collect firearms (yokels), surveilance gear (perverts), or trophy pelts (poachers). IMO, those are 'infantile hobbies.

Still, I'm certainly not defending this 'Jeff' character. Afterall, he supposedly asked the opinion of an over-zealous talkshow host and the predictible happened. I just find it hard to defend a lamb if it simply jumps into the butcher's lap.

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2. Is Dr. Phil right for calling it "infantile behavior"?

.........

Sorry, I have a mixed opinion of this. However, I believed 2 things should've been obvious after analyzing this: 1). I by no condition consider Mr. Phil a professional other than that of a showman. Afterall, he learned from the best. 2). Phil was most likely only giving his opinion (as one can't possibly give an adequate diagnosis over television...a talkshow, no less. Therefore his words should in no way be taken too seriously. In front an audience, a performer is asked to give his opinion on another grown man's desire to collect stuffed toys.....obviously Mr. Phil would give an answer the majority of his watchers would prefer to hear and expect. As I recall, he almost lost his early television career doing otherwise. Showbiz is a cruel biz.

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3. At what point must we ourselves grow up and act our ages?

I believe that is dependent upon yourself, taking into account your comfort, your goals, and your survival (those considered odd are always targets). One's maturity is relative to one's personality (as different from another's as seashells on the shore)....in otherwords: an individual's personal rate of maturity is different for each person and should be expected as such. I feel someone insisting that everyone mature at the same rate is ridiculous and a lost cause.

And that's simply this nonfur's humble opinion.

[Ferret Gamer Kei]

I don't watch TV but I know who this Phil guy is. Personally I have to agree with Mazz. He's a crack pot and deserves to be locked up in places where no one will ever find his dead and decaying body O_O


1. There is never "too many plushies"
2. Infantile? Pfft. He's calling the whole Furry Community Infantile then.
3. Grow up? As the Toys R Us commercials says "I don't wanna grow up"

'>

[Night_Wolfe69]

Why take Dr. Phil seriously, he has mental issues.... literally.  And not the one of the nice healthy ones like manic depressive disorder or anything like that.  He is clinically delusionally.

[Nikko]

 I don't think we should concentrate so much on what qualifys him so much as what he says. In the end it's just common sence that he offers to people... Most are idiots and most can't really function. Some are just on the border and some yet are just "Freaks" as most would lable them. Jeff would be one of those "Freaks" Just like we are. Dr Phil is right... It's infentile but is that wrong. It's not always normal to rollplay and I think that concerns Dr Phil because like anyone else if it's obsession or compulsive one has to ask to what degree. I don't have a PHD either but in the end I don't think it's nessicery for someone to offer quality blunt opinions to others. If that is how you take it, then it's really hard to be offended. It's just a blunt oppinion.

 I think that jeff is fine personaly but he more then likely has some social ishues... Don't we all though... Who cares... I think RP is harmless if it's not affecting his social life and intereaction with others too much... The fandom is here for jeff so it's ok. He will always have a place with other people. This being said I don't think he is in any danger. The fact that he called Dr Phil just shows that it's caused a bit of conflict in his life though... He wanted answers and Dr Phil was willing to give him his. I don't see the problem here.

 ----=Nikko=----

[Burr]

Quote (Nikko @ April 27 2005, 3:10 pm)

I think that concerns Dr Phil because like anyone else if it's obsession or compulsive one has to ask to what degree. ... The fact that he called Dr Phil just shows that it's caused a bit of conflict in his life though... He wanted answers and Dr Phil was willing to give him his. I don't see the problem here.

*nods* Good points. I don't think we should be as offended by what he said as some of us seem to be. Like people said 30 seconds is not enough to really get to the issue, and you have to admit that it COULD be a problem for this Jeff guy. It wasn't just that this guy was into Care Bears and roleplaying and Dr. Phil decided to bash him solely based on it. It's a little more complex than that. Re-read. He said if Jeff was OK with it then that's OK. That it's kind of (not completely) infantile. That he might want to move on to something else (if it's having a negative impact on him). For all the bad things said about him he sure took care to qualify his answer with those words.

[Darkness Falls]

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My questions to all the furs here is: 1. Is it wrong to have so many stuffed animals? 2. Is Dr. Phil right for calling it "infantile behavior"? 3. At what point must we ourselves grow up and act our ages?  Jeff's experience here kinda makes me wonder about how all of us are into the furry fandom. At what point do you see yourself saying that it's time to grow up and move on? How long do you think you'll be in the furry fandom?

1. No.
2. Possibly, yeah, but infantile isn't the same as wrong.
3. Must we? Never. Can we? Sure, whenever we feel comfortable doing so.

I once read a quote in someone else's sig on another forum, which is itself based on the Bible quote. The quote went

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Once I became a man, I put away childish things, including the fear of being childish and the need to appear so very grown-up.

I see no better place for its application than here. I know a lot of the things I enjoy (furries, video games, roleplaying, strawberry milkshake etc.) are slightly childish, but what does it matter? I can live with it. If Doctor Phil can't, then, well, tough luck on him. '>

D.F.

[Mika Feldy]

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1. Is it wrong to have so many stuffed animals? 2. Is Dr. Phil right for calling it "infantile behavior"? 3. At what point must we ourselves grow up and act our ages?

A1. Nah, I myself like plushies. If you love an animal(s) that much you should show it.

A2. No, that was very un-professional of him. Dr.Phil could have atleast said that was his oppinian.

A3. Never. Act how you want, thats what furry is about anyways IMO. If you want to act above or under your age, thats fine. Just don't let it get way to out of hand.

[Nocte]

I've seen this Dr. Phil once or twice on TV, and I was quite underwhelmed. I just checked his site to see if I had the right guy in mind, and yes that's him. (It also says he has "a B.S, M.A. and Ph.D. in clinical psychology" and "has been a board-certified and licensed clinical psychologist since 1978" -- if that's true then maybe he's not a complete quack.)

I agree with Saril that roleplaying with your Care Bear plushies is infantile (because it is something that is characteristic of children). And that doesn't mean it's bad or that you should stop doing it.

Also, this guy asks "How can I stop my friends from making fun of me?". Dr. Phil's wasn't bashing him, he was telling him how to solve his problem. And I can't think of any other solution myself.

(Well, that's not entirely true; he could also stop being friends with them, and that would technically speaking also solve it. Sure they will still be laughing at him, but at least they're not friends anymore. '> )

[Cynic]

Quote (Feldy-MDR @ April 27 2005, 1:00 pm)

1. Is it wrong to have so many stuffed animals? 2. Is Dr. Phil right for calling it "infantile behavior"? 3. At what point must we ourselves grow up and act our ages?

1. I wouldn't say so. I don't see how it's any different from any other collection.

2. From a psychological perspective, such attachment to an inatimate object (and especially one society would widely agree is only supposed to be used by children) is "infantile" behavior, although he could've worded it beter, I agree. (I didn't even see the show, but I did see commercials for it by the way.)

3. Never...well, to an extent. As long as it doesn't interfere with how you function as a member of society, you don't ever have to grow up. When it starts taking over your life and getting in the way of a job, family, relationships, or whatever, it's time to get help.

My thoughts on it

1. I don't think it's wrong to have too many plushies. It's something different for everybody. It could be a hobby, it could be a way to release stress, etc. etc.  What's wrong with that?

2. Well, what is really "infantile behavior"?  Everybody has their way of dealing with things. People are fragile. A change in routine could destroy a person. Everybody has their own way to outlet their feelings, and everybody knows what's best for them. The way this Jeff is described is he's just like the MANY other people who have something that makes them feel good and calm and who's to tell they they can't hold onto what makes them happy?

3. I refuse to never grow up, as many other people. Some people grow up and act their age, but others like me still wanna party on XDDD!

[Jenahfriya]

1. Well, if money's going to the plushies instead of vital stuff, yes one can have too many plushies. Aside from that and space requirements, there's no real limit to plushies. [That reminds me... I need to send off the order for those plushies I've been eying...]

2. Yeah, it's "infantile." It's childish. Of course, I know that it's childish for me to curl up with my Gloworm every night, but I do it anyway. The little guy helps me relax after a stressful day. Childish and wrong aren't the same thing. If this guy likes his Care Bears, more power to him.

3. I see no reason to "grow up." I have plushies. I play video games. I act silly at work. I'm mature enough to know that life can be fun if you'll only let it be so, and that while there are times to be serious, there are also times to be silly.
And then there are times to scare yourself silly playing Resident Evil 4... Ah, good times, good times.

[Firehazard]

Well, the guy asked Dr. Phil for advice and a professional opinion (inasmuch as Dr. Phil could be considered a professional).  That's what he got.  If he's not comfortable with the advice, then he's perfectly welcome to not take it.  Dr. Phil isn't in control of his life.  Plus, like Burr said, he did qualify what he said and didn't make the guy out to be a complete dolt, which, honestly, makes him more reasonable than probably 99% percent of his audience.

In other words, I'm filing this in the same drawer as the Rush Limbaugh thing.

Yeah....    And he's ugly, too!

[Charralina]

Quote (Sno-Pak @ April 26 2005, 10:20 pm)

1. Is it wrong to have so many stuffed animals? 2. Is Dr. Phil right for calling it "infantile behavior"? 3. At what point must we ourselves grow up and act our ages?

1. Heck no! I have more than 400 Beanie Babies, and I have no intention of ever selling them.
2. Like others said, it's much better than collecting dead bodies. It isn't hurting anyone to like plushies.
3. You can stay a child your entire life, I don't care. As long as you aren't doing anything to hurt anyone, I'm fine with it.

Quote (Coven @ April 26 2005, 10:29 pm)

i don't understand how anyone can listen to Dr. Phil. he has no docterate, and i still don't understand how his fat ### managed to sell a million copies of his diet book.

acually, he has a doctorate in clinical psychology

[greatfox]

Quote (Far_Raptor @ April 27 2005, 3:19 am)

Quote You are describing the antics of another pop-psychologist named "Dr Laura" aka Laura Schlesinger, who also goes by "Dr" but also has no Doctorate in anything remotely having to do with people. Is that really true?  That quack has no M.D.?  I honestly had no idea.   That's good to hear.  Now I can feel guilt free for positively hating Dr. Laura.   Not that everything she says is bad.  She's just...chafes me the wrong way.

From her press release:

"Born in Brooklyn, N.Y., Dr. Laura received her bachelor’s degree in biological sciences from SUNY Stonybrook, and her master’s and doctorate in physiology from Columbia University. She holds a post-doctoral certificate in Marriage, Family and Child Counseling (MFCC) from the University of Southern California."

[P_Z]

Okay i never heard of any of these doctors, but my oppinion is this:

1. Is it wrong to have so many stuffed animals?

-Well, i think that Jeff guy must feel some sort of nostalgia about his childhood with those care bears which must have grown to an obsession. They must have meant alot to him when he was a child, and it was probably something too precious for him to just let it go.

2. Is Dr. Phil right for calling it "infantile behavior"?

-Yes indeed, it is infantile. Liking/doing anything that's meant for kids is childish. But that only has importance in how it is percieved from the outside world. If i liked care bears, i wouldn't care much about it myself, but i would definately care what someone else would think of me. There's always a certain reputation you have to make for yourself when you're in society.

3. At what point must we ourselves grow up and act our ages?

-As you grow, your intelect develops, so in search of more "intelligent" activities, people discard of some older activities, which are almost the same with all people. They are considered childish. Watching tv shows for example, is considered childish when it's a baby cartoon like care bears is. But as people get older they start to watch shows for a much more mature audience (whether it's a cartoon or not) and leave the old shows as a good memory of childhood.

It depends on what aspects of furry you like to be able to correctly classify whether it is infantile or not.

[Arbutus]

Quote (P_Z @ April 30 2005, 5:57 am)

3. At what point must we ourselves grow up and act our ages? -As you grow, your intelect develops, so in search of more "intelligent" activities, people discard of some older activities, which are almost the same with all people. They are considered childish.

Ah yes, but why aren't we allowed to enjoy the intelligent and the childish at the same time? If we hold a steady job and follow politics and enjoy watching old episodes of Seinfeld or whatever, there's no doubt about our maturity... so why does being mature mean that we have to give up everything that we once loved?

And, come to think of it, why is an attachment to animals or a collection of plushies considered immature anyway? Don't just accept the surface explanation for that question of mine, think about it a little more deeply... it's different from the mainstream, certainly, but what makes it immature? A simple adult allergy to anything associated with the people they once were? Hmm....

[P_Z]

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Ah yes, but why aren't we allowed to enjoy the intelligent and the childish at the same time? If we hold a steady job and follow politics and enjoy watching old episodes of Seinfeld or whatever, there's no doubt about our maturity... so why does being mature mean that we have to give up everything that we once loved?

I don't think there's anything wrong with watching shows from your childhood, everyone does it. Things like that can be looked back at with a smile, as a memory of the good old days... But being obsessed starts being a problem. I mean people definately should outgrow some things - how can you see a 40 year old man drinking milk from a baby bottle?

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And, come to think of it, why is an attachment to animals or a collection of plushies considered immature anyway? Don't just accept the surface explanation for that question of mine, think about it a little more deeply... it's different from the mainstream, certainly, but what makes it immature? A simple adult allergy to anything associated with the people they once were? Hmm....

Most people like animals from the dawn of civilisation, but plushies are usually perceived as dolls you played with as a child, and not specificaly the animals they represent. Being a fur isnt considered childish, plushies are. And since it greatly deviates from the mainstream... well no wonder why some hate us.

[Midnight Fury]

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1. Is it wrong to have so many stuffed animals? 2. Is Dr. Phil right for calling it "infantile behavior"? 3. At what point must we ourselves grow up and act our ages?

1) No.
2) No.
3) Never.

I refuse to "grow up" and be some brooding old hag who sits around and watches reality television all day because she decided to chuck her imagination and creativity to the curb because some old coot called it "childish."

I collect My Little Ponies. I draw MLP. I WOULD write about them if I could do it anymore. I DO roleplay as my MLP characters. And if Dr. Phil came by and told me I was being "infantile" for doing so, I'd give him a nice snarky look and say, "Okay, thanks for giving me my daily dose of BS, ya old fart!"

Seriously, people wouldn't be so uptight and cranky all the time if they'd just let their inner child out like they SHOULD.

Edited for typing errors.

[Bluetail]

1. Is it wrong to have so many stuffed animals?

Hah! I have them things coming out the ears. So, I would say not, unless your paycheck exists solely to obtain more. That would be the only case where it could be harmful.

2. Is Dr. Phil right for calling it "infantile behavior"?

Not in this case, I think. He may have some underlying issues, but it is not so extreme to be called infantile. I personally am frightened of the extreme cases, as mentioned, who enjoy acting literally as babies. I want a plush of Brightheart Raccoon. It makes me a bad individual!

3. At what point must we ourselves grow up and act our ages?

Never entirely. "Acting one's age" is a relative if bogus statement. Who decrees what is entirely appropriate? Acting like a goose is -fun-. It makes life interesting.

It is true if one is overly obsessed with anything it can be negative and harmful to the individual. I agree with that. Too much of anything can kill you. But if it is not to a maniacal degree, one shouldn't be overly worried. I know I have some issues of my own. When I was little, I had a punkass father who always sold, threw away or gave away my favorite things. Such as my TMNT's and Ghostbuster figures. My favorite stuffed tiger (with kitten and adopted kitten). Baby pictures. Near everything. So, now that I have the power to, I like correcting my greviances. I have a big plush collection, love certain action figures and basically am a bit of a horder now. However, it is not an obsession. It's a side interest. The important matters (such as food and housing) still come first. But if I wish to be a goose I will be. And I will indeed wear a pirate hat in public if I want to... with ears and tail of course ! '>