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Offline chimera soul

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screwed up
« on: November 02, 2003, 05:25:24 pm »
i didnt plan on being back so soon but my heads so bleep up, i got all these thoughts in my head and there totally flippin' me up.
i have all these thoughts and i cant understand them, i feel alone and i cant help that feeling, of being issolated and angry and sad and scared.
i want to go to sleep and never wake up, i think i hurt someone, and i feel bad, but another part of me doesnt care.
i want to scream and cry and lash out and hurt someone but i cant work out why, i want to jump off a bridge or cut my wrists and just end it all but i dont know why, i want to think i'm a good person but these thoughts make me feel sick inside. i feel like i bleep up everything and  everything i touch turns to crap. i cant explain it, i was happy last night and now i feel like i want to die or something.i'm scared of myself, but i cant stop the thoughts an d i cant control the feelings
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you can't contain the inner beast

Offline Ukiko

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screwed up
« Reply #1 on: November 02, 2003, 06:02:09 pm »
Hey....Chimera......your post has me worried.  If you need someone to talk to, please do so.  I'll be more than happy to talk to you if you feel like venting or whatever.  I know you don't know me well, but.....I'm here if you need to talk.  And I'm sure there are a LOT of others who would say the same.  Just, please, don't do anything impulsive......
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screwed up
« Reply #2 on: November 02, 2003, 06:05:07 pm »
Chimera... Please stop this...
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Offline Running_Wolf

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screwed up
« Reply #3 on: November 03, 2003, 02:19:28 pm »
Don't let those thoughts get to you. The worst thing you can do is give in to them. Think positively about life and they'll go away. Never think you're worthless. Never think you're crap. You aren't and you know that. You aren't alone. You've got us. We're all here to help you though thick and thin. You haven't hurt anyone. Don't do anything that will hurt you. Just think positive thoughts. I haven't been through anything like what you're going through but the amount of bullying I get at school qualifies as mental torture. Think positive! Don't do anything rash!
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Offline Drake Blackpaw

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screwed up
« Reply #4 on: November 03, 2003, 09:21:38 pm »
Hey Chimera,

I don't know what happened, but take a couple of deep breaths and calm down.

If you need to talk to someone, you can pm me or one of the other furs.

If you made a mistake and hurt someone, you usually can go back and patch things up.  It can be really difficult and awkward but it can be done.
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Offline Kada-Ru

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screwed up
« Reply #5 on: November 04, 2003, 03:38:16 am »
I know it is difficult when ones mind doesn't seem to feel like it should. That is when one needs to really get ahold of oneself and try and figure things out by either talking to others or someone in the profession.

You made a step to wanting to figure out what is going on by stating something here. I am glad you felt comfortable enough that you could.

I did see you posting again so I am hoping you are feeling better about yourself and life in general.

There will be times in our lives when we may hurt others whether that is on purpose or not, it does happen. Like Drake stated, you could always go to the person and tell them you are sorry. Hopefully the person will forgive you. (wraps warm wings around the chimera for a little friendly comfort.)
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Offline Basiix

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screwed up
« Reply #6 on: December 13, 2003, 09:22:53 am »
Why don't you try to put this stuff into your music and out of your life. This is what most metal acts do and it seems to work, look at Jonathon Davis of KoRn, he used to cry at every concert he went to with all the hurt and anger he felt but now it seems to be all gone so I guess that works. This is what I do anyway.

I can't tell what you are feeling but I believe it is similar to my case, you aren't alone and it is pretty damn scary but if you can find an outlet for this anger/hatred/self-loathing (other than pain) you'll be better off.
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Offline Da_Bear

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screwed up
« Reply #7 on: January 06, 2004, 06:52:43 pm »
HOLY crap MAN, thats how ive always felt but ive always been worried that someone might freak if i told them how i felt.  Its like you stole the words right out of my heart.  Your all going ot think im bleep up for agreeing with chimera on this but, well what can i say.  You could turn that into a song.
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Dont worry, I do this !@#$ all the time. No its not a career but a very serious hobby.

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Offline chimera soul

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screwed up
« Reply #8 on: January 08, 2004, 08:08:25 pm »
it wasa song but i never met anyone who would listen to it as a song, besides, it aint that good and i not a singer
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you can't contain the inner beast
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