furry arts discussion > furry storytelling
Paws's short story challenge
Jet:
I dont know. Although it is good to think about the audience that will read it, and try to make it understandable to them, I think its more important to think of the subject. This character knows a lot about cars, so naturally he would know all the lingo and stuff a normal person wouldn't know. I do so in Project Tango. The main character thinks a certain way based on her personality. So although a normal person would yell at her to go back and bury her best friend or give some last words, she wont. In her life, people dont do that, this is normal for her. I will have a similar issue with Project Foxtrot since the main character is basically insane and truely believes there in someone traveling with him. The fact is this other person is just a figment of his imagination, and both dont act "normal." So I think its better stay true to the character's personality and mindset, but maybe give small context clues as to what the things he is talking about is.
Anyways, this was a good story, even if I understood about ten percent of it. x_x That's okay, we have internets nowadays. And you were right when you said you were getting a little long with these. :D Don't worry too much I guess. But anyhows, it was a good read. So whats about another word for ya. I will attempt one of sort of the other side of the work spectrum. How about Lazy. 8)
typingwithpaws:
have a bad case of the laze, will get onto it hopefully later tonight....IRC is so distracting hahahaha
Mylo:
--- Quote from: typingwithpaws on July 23, 2012, 03:54:11 am ---have a bad case of the laze, will get onto it hopefully later tonight....IRC is so distracting hahahaha
--- End quote ---
Tell me about it. :P I've neglected mine as well...
Jet:
--- Quote from: Mylo on July 23, 2012, 05:00:17 am ---
--- Quote from: typingwithpaws on July 23, 2012, 03:54:11 am ---have a bad case of the laze, will get onto it hopefully later tonight....IRC is so distracting hahahaha
--- End quote ---
Tell me about it. :P I've neglected mine as well...
--- End quote ---
I've just decided to do one every so often. In between other work I have to do. Sort of a way to keep me at least writing something without taking too long of a period without writing. But I don't think i will be posting three stories a day any time soon. That's ok though. :)
typingwithpaws:
ok...got an idea for it....
Maximum:
Wind rushed across the tips of the swell, tossing the thin water into a mist as the wave crested. Up and over the undulations in the water surface I went, with each pass adjusting my weight to keep the boat steady.
The tell-tails on the sail were spinning in random directions, indicating that I was required to make an adjustment to the mainsheet. I checked my heading then looked down briefly to search for the mainsheet rope. It was lying in a tangled mess in the bottom of the small boat but was still cleated off to the cross member where I had left it.
I quickly ducked down and grabbed the rope and gave it a small tug to disengage it from the cleat then returned to my usual seat on the gunwale.
Giving the rope a small tug achieved the result I was looking for, all the tell-tails on the sail began streaming toward the rear of the sail as the wind was captured and redirected efficiently.
"Right; where's that mark?" I said to myself as I searched the horizon for the small yellow inflatable buoy. It was my goal, it marked the finish line and so far, it marked my place on the podium if my boats handicap correction was up to scratch.
There it was, appearing intermittently between wave crests as it rose and fell.
There was a change in the air, I could smell it first, then as I twitched my ears to my left side I could hear the squall approaching. I turned my head slightly to snatch a glance, sure enough, a dark shadow on the water was sneaking up on me at an alarming rate. The gust was like an invisible monster that rushed out of no where to grab unsuspecting sailors, such as the unfortunate tiger in her Mirror behind me. I watched as the gust took hold of her sails and pushed her boat over onto it's side like a leaf in a hurricane. Thankfully I had less sail area in my trusty wooden Sabre and I also had time to prepare for the upcoming excess.
I leaned out of the cockpit, using my legs under the straps to hold on in preparation. Suddenly the wind dropped. The boat lurched to windward and my tail dipped into the seawater. The cold surprise made me jump a little. Just as I had planned the gust then took hold and the boat heaved over to leeward. I was catapulted skyward during the manoeuvre but my body weight was not sufficient to hold the boat at an acceptable level. Instinct took over and I spilled some wind from the sail to allow the boat to return to an acceptable angle.
Now with the boat sitting flat I yanked on the mainsheet again and the boat rocketed away.
The waves tossed and turned the small vessel and made it quite a handful to keep under control. The speed I had picked up was monumental, the whole rigging was beginning to hum and the tiller vibrated softly in my paw, this truly was the Sabre's maximum speed.
Up ahead there was a large cruising catamaran, whose owner had entered the race as an excuse to get the white behemoth out for a day. Even with it's immense size it was still keeping pace with my current speed. However, the crew were on deck sipping cold drinks while the simply waited for the finish line to arrive. Meanwhile in my small dingy it was utter chaos.
My fur was soaked to the skin and my ears burned from the chilly wind. I growled at the cruiser's crew, I guess I was jealous but I also know that I was having more fun.
Looking up again I noticed that in the commotion, the distance had closed a considerable amount between myself and the finish line. There was only a few minutes of sailing left before I would have to head home.
Gritting my teeth, I checked all my settings, the tell-tails, the luff, the heading then settled down. Sitting still and making hardly any adjustments was a sure way to pick up speed. The less you move the tiller, the less drag you create and hence the faster you go.
Seconds crept by while the strong wind howled and pulled at the rigging. But to my delight, ever so slowly the distance between myself and the large cat closed. They had already lost to me on corrected time anyway but I was still determined to beat them across the line.
A minute passed and I was overtaking the wash that their yacht created, the crew saw what I was up to and all stood up to cheer me on. I felt my cheeks heat up, It was slightly embarrassing but it felt good to have positive reinforcement, especially from the competition.
Our boats were now level. Thankfully I remembered to pass on the windward side or due to the large size of their sail, I would have never passed them as they block a lot of wind.
The finish line was close, breaking my concentration for a second I looked to the control boat. The operator was holding up the siren ready to announce the completion of the race.
As if the Sabre itself knew what I was doing, it inched forward, putting my a few feet in front of the catamaran.
A double siren sounded from the control boat. We had both finished but what confirmed my success was a loud roar from the lion with the siren and a shout of "Well done Chip!"
The catamaran crew cheered and I beamed widely. Today was a great day for a race.
First person....there you go. let the critics read and bask in it's.....learningness (:
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