Author Topic: My first poem, Alone in the dark  (Read 1059 times)

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Offline killrhawk

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My first poem, Alone in the dark
« on: June 26, 2010, 03:39:22 am »
This is my first time actually posting my random angsty poetry for people to see, so please, critique away. Tell me how I can improve. This may be kinda stereotypical poem about light and dark, but it could be symbolim for something See if you can guess.


Alone in the dark
No-one around
I reach for a light
That cannot be found

Trapped in a room
Made of faces of hate
That see me for who I am
And then turn away

To them Iím an outcast
A failure and a waste
While I try to please them
I invoke their rage

Iím then trapped in a cage
Where I canít get out
Nothing can get in
And I start to doubt

Slowly those come
That try to help
But their false knowledge
Keeps them about

And then I see it
The light I so yearn
I push through the cage
And watch the dark burn

In the light Iím greeted
By pounces and hugs
And I can finally be myself
In this place I call home



Thanks for reading!  (:
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    Killrhawk

Thanks so much to Aerisyka for the avatar!

Offline Cakez the Husky

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Re: My first poem, Alone in the dark
« Reply #1 on: June 30, 2010, 05:38:23 pm »
Welcome home XD *pounce* :3 *hug*  :D

That poem is so me :D
Cakez the Husky!
A very loving Husky! <3

Offline killrhawk

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Re: My first poem, Alone in the dark
« Reply #2 on: July 03, 2010, 02:40:27 am »
Thanks so much!  (:
Have PSN? Add me!
    Killrhawk

Thanks so much to Aerisyka for the avatar!