Author Topic: The Vampire!  (Read 935 times)

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Offline Alexandre

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The Vampire!
« on: February 26, 2010, 10:55:43 am »
We had "Bad Poetry Night" at my college; I brought a few poems to read, but this is the only one I actually wrote for the event.  So, I apologize in advance for the atrocity that follow. :)

The Vampire

I was dating Brenda
And I said, 'Lets go
to the lake' and she
said 'no' but it was
Too Late because she
Was in my fast car
that was as FAST as
a Lambourguini but it
Was A Honda Acord.

When she got out of
The Honda Accord, she
Sparkled really bright
Like the way Edward Cullen
sparkled but it would look
Mor like Jacob if he
Was a vampire instead of
a werewolf.  Brenda was Mexican.

I yelled, 'You are a vampire!'
loud, and I could see her
sharp Teeth like dog Teeth
When their angry and
They growl.

I ran like
the Speed of Sound but
She got me and bit my
Neck and sucked my blood
like the way a person kisses
too hard and sucks your tongue
Into their mouth, but it was
My Neck.  She laugghed, and I
Cried because I was too slow
And now I sparkle like Edward
Cullen because I am white and
also a vampire.
Allasso, Volume 2: Saudade is now out!  Feel free to check it out ^_^

Offline Arbutus

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Re: The Vampire!
« Reply #1 on: February 26, 2010, 04:42:40 pm »
YOU ARE A VAMPIRE!

Nice. You write badly very well. :D

For some reason, I laughed out loud at "but it was My Neck." Thanks for clarifying!

Offline Adrius

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Re: The Vampire!
« Reply #2 on: February 26, 2010, 05:10:34 pm »
LOL

I just watched the "Twilight Rifftrax" part where Kevin is doing an interpretation of Edwards song to Bella. So that may make me biased as to how funny this is. Either way, I agree with Arbutus. I got a good chuckle out of the "it was as FAST as a lamborghini but it was a Honda Accord." part.

Very nice, A+!

"Like reflections on the page
The world's what you create."
-Dream Theater "Wither"

Offline Kay Alett

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Re: The Vampire!
« Reply #3 on: February 26, 2010, 08:35:24 pm »
My god! That was so bad I think you gave me cancer! - Calculon
Semi-Retired from Furry.
 - - - -
Come bitter Rain,
And wash from my Heart
That saddest of all Words: Home

Offline Alexandre

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Re: The Vampire!
« Reply #4 on: February 27, 2010, 03:03:50 am »
My god! That was so bad I think you gave me cancer! - Calculon
Dude.  Thanks, guys.  :)

Now just imagine me reading this at a university to a panel of three professors.  :D
Allasso, Volume 2: Saudade is now out!  Feel free to check it out ^_^