Author Topic: the monkey's paw  (Read 10594 times)

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Offline Furenzied

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #300 on: February 24, 2014, 06:32:37 am »
You become so singular minded that you can only do one thing ever.

I wish I could speak Japanese better.  :P
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Offline Kastra Epsilon

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #301 on: February 24, 2014, 01:41:20 pm »
Japanese is now your best language... and your only one.

I wish sharpening pencils wasn't so much effort.

Offline HazardJackal

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #302 on: February 24, 2014, 01:53:04 pm »
It's easy now.  In fact, nothing goes wrong whatsoever, except for the fact that it failed the do something bad, which is means that the wish was bad for the wish itself, causing the wish to backfire and create puppies and kittens that distract you from your work.

I wish i could play a banjo.

Offline Furenzied

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #303 on: February 24, 2014, 05:57:34 pm »
You lose all your teeth and sit in the sun all day with nothing but overalls on and play the banjo really well.

I wish for pokemon and digimon to exist...but no crazy evil people...
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Offline HazardJackal

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #304 on: February 24, 2014, 06:25:56 pm »
Okay, they do, and no crazy evil people.  Too bad you didn't say anything about crazy evil Pokemon!

I wish i wasn't so morally upright...

Offline Furenzied

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #305 on: February 25, 2014, 08:18:29 am »
You become a politician.

I wish to be the inventor of the backs of earrings.
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Offline HazardJackal

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #306 on: February 25, 2014, 05:23:18 pm »
Unfortunately, you don't figure out how to create the front side of earrings, and you go bankrupt because you have no product to produce.

I wish i was evil, but not a politician.

Offline The Wise one

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #307 on: February 25, 2014, 08:31:18 pm »
You're a ruthless dictator who eventually gets assassinated.

I wish I had a superhuman ability.
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Offline HazardJackal

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #308 on: February 25, 2014, 08:33:34 pm »
You become the most humanly human in the history of humanity.

I wish i could juggle potatoes with my elbows.

Offline ColonelMustang

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #309 on: February 25, 2014, 09:16:22 pm »
you learn to juggle potatoes with only your elbows, but can do nothing else therefor starving to death

I wish i could get away with any crime
« Last Edit: February 25, 2014, 09:23:47 pm by SeaOfWhispers »
Sarzon! <-- inside joke


Offline Kastra Epsilon

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #310 on: February 26, 2014, 04:30:14 pm »
You get away with all the crimes ever, but that's only because friends, family, people you know or like, always end up taking the blame instead. And whenever all your friends die/are unavailable due to being in jail, you are forced to make new friends, because that's the only way the wish will continue to function. :c

I wish I could get good food that I like for free forever.

Offline HazardJackal

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #311 on: February 26, 2014, 04:34:35 pm »
Struck by lightning in the middle of dinner!

I wish that horrible things will happen to me.

Offline ColonelMustang

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #312 on: February 26, 2014, 07:41:40 pm »
(hey i still get to commit crimes for ever..well until i run out of people.)

People become horrifyingly nice to you until you die from kindness

i wish i could live in my favorite book
Sarzon! <-- inside joke


Offline HazardJackal

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #313 on: February 26, 2014, 09:34:55 pm »
The reader slams the book shut, smashing you.

I wish i could fly!  WEEEEEE!!!!

Offline ColonelMustang

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #314 on: February 27, 2014, 03:03:52 pm »
You fly into an active jet turbine.

I wish i was a time lord
Sarzon! <-- inside joke


Offline Kastra Epsilon

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #315 on: February 27, 2014, 08:13:00 pm »
Time Lords are against the laws of everything in this world, thus causing the laws of everything to malfunction and generate large amounts of anti-matter.

I wish making wishes wasn't so much effort.

Offline ColonelMustang

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #316 on: February 27, 2014, 09:02:50 pm »
wishing becomes so easy everybody can do it, and somebody wishes for everybody to die.

I wish all food tasted like my favorite food.
Sarzon! <-- inside joke


Offline Firelight

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #317 on: February 28, 2014, 02:17:59 am »
All you taste is your favorite food and can't taste anything else

I wish I was a wolf   :goldglee:

Offline HazardJackal

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #318 on: February 28, 2014, 02:24:06 am »
Sarah Palin.

I wish i could get my act together and figure out what i'm going to do with my life...

Offline ColonelMustang

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #319 on: February 28, 2014, 03:41:34 pm »
You get your life together so well people become envious and kill you

I wish i could wish
Sarzon! <-- inside joke


Offline Mu Rho Ni

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #320 on: February 28, 2014, 03:46:53 pm »
Granted but you can only wish for mlp memes

I wish for one billion dollars!
Great men are forged in fire, it is the privilege of lesser men to light the flame. (The real 9th doctor)

Though the morrow is barren of promise ,nothing shall forestall my return. (Genesis FFVII crisis core)

Sir Macaroni. Master of the universe by day. Door to door macaroni salesman by night.

Offline ColonelMustang

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #321 on: February 28, 2014, 03:49:12 pm »
(i hate you :P)
You have a billion dollars worth of useless sand.

I wish pokemon were real
Sarzon! <-- inside joke


Offline Kastra Epsilon

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #322 on: February 28, 2014, 04:21:01 pm »
Pokemon are now real! But soon everything is destroyed: forests are quickly burned, cities collapse, and fierce water types sink ships. Oh, and don't forget about legendarys. Not to mention, Pokemon, being existent, are capable of losing health beyond fainting, so they can now die too, and being a Pokemon trainer is much harder now. Worst of all, Joey's top-percentage rattata died.

I wish I could freely enter and exit video game worlds from this one instead of just playing them from a screen.

Offline ColonelMustang

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #323 on: February 28, 2014, 05:02:55 pm »
(Not joey's rattata!!!)
As your about to exit a game the power goes out corrupting your data and deleting you.

I wish i could pass all my college classes
Sarzon! <-- inside joke


Offline Mu Rho Ni

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Re: the monkey's paw
« Reply #324 on: February 28, 2014, 10:51:15 pm »
Congratulations!!! You pass......them off to someone else as you are forced to work in a Malaysian sweat shop for the rest of your life.

I wish i had my own Lt. Data.
Great men are forged in fire, it is the privilege of lesser men to light the flame. (The real 9th doctor)

Though the morrow is barren of promise ,nothing shall forestall my return. (Genesis FFVII crisis core)

Sir Macaroni. Master of the universe by day. Door to door macaroni salesman by night.